Why does everyone do these massive chaotic birthday parties these days?

[20PoundsOfCrazyInA5PoundBag]

It just seems so not worth it to me. Taking a couple friends to have a real special day and making lasting memories just makes more sense to me than taking 30 kids to have chicken nuggets and run around a play place. And much less stress. I mean fair play if that's what you want to do, but why do people expect it these days. Like it's some kind of trend? Just why?

Because you have to invite every child in the neighbourhood so no one feels left out ever.

Agree op once invited all the girls in the class what nightmare. Dd didn't like or have anything to do with about a third of the guests, and they were the badly behaved ones. We now have a 10 guest limit. Mine didn't like big parties and we certainly didn't!

Round here they only do the whole class parties in Reception. Everybody seems to come to their senses after that

Same here - reception only and it seemed to be more about the parents getting to know each other tbh.

DS1 remembers every detail of his third and fourth birthday play centre parties (and his little brother's), so no problem with 'making memories' distasteful phrase there. He loved having his hoards of pre-school/school mates there, and since it's the done thing where we are, we didn't feel we could buck the trend.

Also, all DH and I had to do was phone up, book, then let somebody else sort out the food, entertainment and clean up, release birthday boy and little brother into the play frames, while we sat on our exhausted arses, drinking coffee, eating cake and staring at the wall.

I loathe play centres as a rule and rarely take the DCs to them outside of parties, but for birthdays they really come into their own. Saving them for birthdays only also means the DCs do see them as a birthday treat and just love them.

So that's why.

I only have a toddler so am pre the birthday party thing but am already worried about them! From reading on here and from colleagues with older kids it sounds like the whole class parties are becoming more and more the norm. It's crazy! People's weekends seem to become beholden to ferrying their kids to parties, parents have to pay through the nose for that many invitees plus the cost of 25+ gifts throughout the year (not to mention all the space they take up).

I can definitely understand why people have them at places like soft play (less work!) but the whole class party thing is a different matter. I'm hoping that when DS goes to school he's in a year group with similarly curmudgeonly parents!

Because they like it! Birthday parties are a major source of excitement for young children, especially 5-7 year olds. The time for a day out/activity with a couple of close friends comes a bit later.

DanceswithOtters Hosting parents would then spend the rest of the week scraping jam and Wotsits out of the carpet, and drinking gin to anaesthetise themselves to the memories of having to keep small children under control during party games. Life was not simpler.

And there you have it. You know the other things play centres have? Moppable floors. Not to mention other people wielding the mops.

If they have carpets, more fool them, but at least it's their hassle.

Yes I really hate them. The food has really gone downhill too! I find there’s nothing I fancy a nibble on these days !

"Everyone" doesn't have massive parties. Lots of parents are more sensible measured in their approach.

However, you can go out for the day at anytime during the year. It can be lovely and can create lovely memories, but that isn't exclusive to a trip out. You can create lovely memories playing party games with your friends - which, you only tend to do at birthday parties, if you think about it.