Cannot cope :(

[helzaba]

I have 2 kids my son is 2 and my daughter is 11 months. My daughter has been a clingy nightmare for the last 2 months or so I can't put her down as she screams, I literally carry her around 80% of the day. She won't go to her dad as she just screams! He's sure she just doesn't like him which is heartbreaking. She nips bunches and bites when she doesn't get her way of being picked up, but today it reached a new level. I was getting my 2 year old dressed and obviously I didn't have hold of her and she started taking it out on him 😞 he was crying because she'd nipped him that hard and it left quite a big mark. I just don't know where to turn. She needs to get out of this behaviour but I have no idea how, I know I need a break from her to get a new perspective on it as I'm just getting frustrated going round in circles, nobody will look after her as she just screams the entire time she's stopped sleeping pretty much. She's already walking and has been for about 2 months, she's not teething and I've taken her to the doctors who say there's nothing medically wrong. I really hope someone can help because I just want my happy bubbly baby back! X

That does sound hard. Has anything changed in her life like starting nursery?

Please be.ieve me when I say that she does love her DF. My first wouldn’t go to his Dad for a long time but it isn’t a reflection of how much he loves him.

Do you think she could be suffering from Separation Anxiety?. And if she’s not sleeping, do you think she may be overtired?

That sounds really hard. Is she sleeping ok? How is your sleeping? Is she having enough snacks?

I found that my DC behaved much better one-DC-to-one-parent, rather than two and two. Does your DD still scream if that happens, or only if your DS is there too?

I did instant time out for kicking and biting. It took a while to stop, but the really loud indignation showed that the DC understood why it was happening.

You need to be firm with her that hurting her brother is not allowed. Instant time out in a play pen or her bedroom for 2 minutes.
It is his home and he needs to feel safe in it.

Can you and your husband have one on one time each night for 30 minutes?
One night your daughter with you whilst your son is with his Dad then switch the next night. In time she'll stop crying and start to join him playing.

It does sound like it might be extreme separation anxiety combined with tiredness.

If she's not sleeping maybe try having her in your bed (not ideal I know but better than super tired baby) and for naps could you put her in a sling- I know she is probably very heavy by now so again not ideal but if you could borrow a decent sling it might be doable? Or maybe a long buggy walk to get her to have at least one nap a day (do you have a buggyboard or double buggy?)

Thank you all 🙂 my sleeping is terrible I'm lucky if I get 3-4 hours a night and the same for grace. I do think it could be down to depression anxiety but I have no idea how to help ease it 😭 I just know it's getting harder and harder to cope. For the first time ever I shouted at her today. I've never shouted at either of them before so I just put her down shut the door and had 5 mins in the kitchen to calm down. Nothing's changed in her routine as far as I'm aware. I'm hoping lots of new toys for Christmas might help xx

Ohh and she starts the night in her bed and usually by 1 she's in ours as she won't settle back down xx