Common or Snob - NEW INFO

[wondergirl]

Firstly, I would like to thank everyone greatly for replying to this thread. We appreciate all of your comments.

The nature of some of the replies however did suggest that some of you felt the contents of the thread were our groups opinion. I have to make clear at this point these are not our gruops opinions.

We have taken onboard all comments and used them constructively to come up with new ways to carry out better research. Loooking back I can see how the results look biased to those people in public that are anti-dummies.

A week ago our group took most peoples advice on this forum, and did a questionaire targeting parents only.

This questionaire threw up different findings as most of you would suggest it would.

Of all the parents we questioned, the vast majority stated they used dummies with their children.
Less of the parents thought dummies were common, but this issue did still crop up.

What seems to be linked also with dummies and the common or snob issue is the AGE at which children are allowed to have dummies to.

The vast majority of the parents surveyed said they definatley wanted their children dummy free by 2-3 years old.
When asked why they wanted to achieve this target, they said they thought it looked bad children walking and talking with a dummy hanging out its mouth.

This is linked to the original questionaire where most parents and non-parents surveyed were most anti-dummies toward older children with dummies, not so much babies.

So my question this time is what is the real issue with dummies - OK for babies but look common in toddlers is the vibe we are getting?

PS Could you particularly help us in these areas

What age did you or will you get rid of your childs dummy?

This probably seems irrelivent, but how did you dispose of the final dummy(s)? e.g. did you chuck it in the dustbin.

Wondergirl you can have a look at thte many threads available about dummies, and how and when to stop, there are some great ideas other not so muc h but, well enough variety.

Good luck with your research

Not a vibe darling, it is just the way it is.

i dislike seeing older children with dummies not because i think it looks "common" but for the same reason i dislike seeing older children in pushchairs. i think that whilst its important not to try and make them grow up too quickly, its also a bad thing to try and keep them babies forever. personally i wouldnt like my child to be ridiculed by friends. this is one of the reasons that i fell out with my in laws...because they just would not let my son grow up.

My DD is currently 2y 3m and does have a number, but at night time only for the past month. Before that she was allowed ut during the day for naps. However that is no longer the case. In a morning she now leaves her dummy on her bedside table and there is stays all day. TBH this didn't cause us any problems and she acceted it very quickly.

Once DD is settled into her new nursey in September and our changes have finished we are planning on getting rid of the dummy for bedtime also - so long as she doesn't find the whole process to distressing. I don't think it is that much of a hassle to get her all worked up about it. DD will be about 2 and a half at the time.

Having read advice on MN this is the approach we are planning on taking:

warn her that the next night the special dummy fairy will be coming to visit her. This fairy will then take her dummy to give to some new little tiny baby who now needs one (because she is now a big girl and doeesn't need one). The fairy will then come and take her dummy whilst asleep but will leave her some small special gift. Then for each night thereafter for about a week/few days the fairy will return and leave a very small token gift (maybe stickers, a crayon, etc. for being such a big girl.

Hopefully it'll work but you'd have to return in September/October to find out!

BTW, my DD has never been allowed to talk (or babble) with her dummy. She has always hand it taken out or told to remove it if she tried. Talking with a dummy is the one thing that does bother me.

God, I can't believe the debate over this dummy thing! Wondergirl, I have a 2.5 yr old and a 3 month old. They have both had dummies from v early on and I without dummies I don't know what I wld have done. With DS, I just removed the dummy when doing sleep training at 6 months. He protested for 2 nights and on the 3rd night I was so tired I decided to give it back to him, but by then he wasn't interested in it at all. He's never had one since.

DD doesn;t love her dummy quite as much for comfort purposes, but it really helps me to "stretch her out" between feeds, so I use it a lot at the moment and plan to remove it in the same way later.

My mother says "Why do you have to use that revolting thing, she looks like something off a council estate" , but I honestly couldn't care less what anyone else thinks it looks like. My baby likes it and that's OK with me. I agree with what someone below said about seeing older kids in buggies with dummies - I think that really IS more about the parent's convenience than the child's benefit.

So I'm not sure how much I conform to the whole "class issue" thing as I would probably be classified as a middle class person - Oxbridge degree, now stay at home mum, but no problem with using a dummy whatsoever for now!

I don't liek it in older kids except for sleeping, because it stops them from talking, they mumble through dummies, my ds never had one. ny dd had one to stretch her out between feds as she had reflux, ditcehd it at 5 mths, thumb took its place. Is this common too when she is older? Should I chop it off?

Well I never had a dummy, sucked my thumb insetad as a child, and er... still suck it very occasionally (but only when very tired/stressed!)

message withdrawn

in spite of the research (mentioned on other threads) I can't help believing that dummies interfere with speech development and teeth, and I wonder if other parents share this instinctive feeling and if so whether this is why they become objectionable in toddlers.
dd is 2.8, adores her dummy, and demands it incessantly when she gets tired (tho' she manages fine at nursery without one). I hate it and am working up to some creative way of getting rid for good. However i suspect that she'll immediately start nicking ds's from his little baby mouth, she has already appointed herself 'dummy monitor' and goes round collecting his from cot, pram etc and 'checking' them.

my Ds wnet without his dummy for a few days last week but went to thumb sucking, and i thought then thumb sucking going to be harder to stop than the dummy so hes got it back now

My dd is exactly like yours hovely, manages fine at creche without a dummy, but will go round pinching them off baby and hiding them, or climbing to reach them off high surfaces. Have now banned them except for at night. If she whines for it i threaten to send her to bed! Love the dummy fairy idea, might try it. Ive also been told keeping the dummy will affect her teeth and speech.