Routine?!

[DZS71017]

So after hearing from people I know with babies having routines with sleeping and eating, I keep questioning everything. I’m a first time mum, DD is 9 weeks old and I still haven’t a clue!

I’m trying to get her into a pattern but it’s hard especially as she sleep eats majority of the time. I’ve tried stripping her off, stroking her face, tickling her feet you name it. She could be crying for 20 minutes for a feed and as soon as the bottle touches her lips it’s as though she’s fast asleep! She also suffers reflux.

It’s hard to get into a good pattern when she could nap for one hour, or nap for 3! There’s no pattern. I try bath at 7pm and bottle, then bring her up around 10pm with me with another bottle and it can really vary how she is. Also suspected colic??

Really struggling to hear how well others are doing when it seems I’m clueless to it all! Any ideas how to help?! Thank you!

You don't have to have a routine. I never did because I'm too disorganised.
If you're pootling along ok and both happy then all is good!

We didn't worry about routine. We just went with what the baby wanted (usually offering a bf) and their own little patterns eventually emerge.

Unless they're losing weight/ not gaining sufficiently I've never worried about how long a feed is or tickling feet etc! And mine only really napped in hour bursts. Some do 2 hours. Some don't.

Why is she crying for 20mins for a feed? Can you feed her when she's hungry? She was probably exhausted after that hence the sleep.

You can try offering a dummy instead if you think she's just wanting to suck a lot.

I do feed her on demand, but it could be she has 1oz and wakes up an hour later. When I have tried to get in routine and see if she is actually hungry or just wants to comfort feed (waiting 20 minutes) she will still only have a tiny bit of a bottle and fall straight back asleep again 😔
She does use a dummy but she soon tells a difference and wants a feed. She’s already on tommee tippee size 2 teets!

Glad to hear she’s not the only one! She’s gaining weight perfectly, she’s 12lb 13 already (chunky monkey) she’s perfectly fine in herself, very alert and smiley. Just trying to get a bit of a routine with her 😔

Do not worry about a routine at 9 weeks. Respond to your baby’s needs as you figure them out. Feeding to sleep is totally normal at that age (and for much longer too).

As hard as it is, try not to compare your baby/routine to other people’s. That way lies madness.

20mins is ages for a 9 week old!! A really long time for them to cry.

I'm sure you will find your own patterns. It is hard on the early weeks- the baby forgets to read the manuals!!

You really should not be making a baby wait for 20 minutes for a feed.

If you want a structure have a look at EASY. You can’t make a baby go into a routine but they do eventually settle into their own structure but timings vary on a day to day basis just in the same way we vary our times slightly.

If you have not already Google 4th trimester. Basically because humans have elvolved to be intelligent with big brains and big heads but your pelvises have not got bigger all human babies are born early.

Are you bf or ff?