How would you know...

[BeauMirchoff]

If the childminder were being mean/unkind/unpleasant to your DC?
ExDP claims DS doesn't like going to the CM and thinks that something's going on and ' how can we leave DS with a complete stranger, we don't know what she gets up to when no one is looking...'
Thoughts?

How old is your DC?

Ultimately, you can’t know. It’s awful, and the reason why I gave up work to stay at home (DH was the significantly higher earner). Absolutely minuscule risk statistically, though.

Yep first how old. My dd is 4 so I can actually ask her quite specific questions.

If younger, and unable to answer even carefully obscured questions, you must go on DS mood change.

Do you trust ex DP? Who vetted the Cm?

She is quite well known and liked in the neighbourhood that she lives in. She does a lot of babysitting too.
My DS is going to be 2 in a few weeks...

Babysitting and childminding are worlds apart legally. Is she OFSTED registered?

Yes. She is registered but she also does babysitting at the weekends, that's how people in the area know her.

I would say that in this case the best you can do is to get to know your childminder very well. Use your instinct, don’t worry about offending her with “awkward” questions (a good childminder will respect your requests), ask other people who have used her/ do use her. Instinct though, mainly.

What makes him think that? And what’s his solution? Will he give up work or look for another childminder?
How is your son at drop off and pick up? It’s normal for children to be a bit upset separating from their parent but if there’s something more then I would wonder.