How much "freedom" do you give you children?

[CountessDracula]

Following Wife Swap last night when one of the mums had a five year old who was out on the streets until 9pm, I just wondered if this was normal behaviour. I don't remember us being allowed out at all in the evenings until we were teenagers, and then our parents had to know where we were going/pick us up etc.

How much freedom did you get? And how much do you give?

Didn't get hardly any. Was allowed to play in friends back garden until about 9pm, but any where else, no way.

My kids are 6, 4 and 19 mths and as yet are not allowed to play out the front at all (unless one of us is out there for some reason).

Just think it will be easier to keep them in the back garden where i can see what they are up to.

I was walking home from Primary School on my own (with my younger brother) when I was 7 or 8. It was only about half a mile though.

When we moved to about a mile away, we walked to school on our own - and even let ourselves in to the house some evenings as Mum and Dad were at Uni.

I can remember playing all around the area unsupervised - but it was a very "nice" middle class area. But not as late as 9.

I was going to my ballet class on my own (walk to station, about a mile, about 5 stops into Glasgow) and another walk up to where the lesson was (about another half mile, which included a lane) from about 8 or 9. Class would have been at 5 I think, so I wouldn't have got home until nearly 7. Mum did "train" me - shadowed me a couple of times until she was sure I knew what to do.

Ds is only 3.10 so doesn't leave the driveway. But we do allow him to go out in the garden on his own - although we do keep an eye out on him, and don't leave hom too long outside without one of us with him (or at least IN the garden).

But once he is older, we DO plan to give him more freedom than now seems to be the "norm".

Umm, I had quite a lot of freedom from being about 11. I think that is more to do with the fact that I spent my teenage years in a small market town in Mid-Wales, than having a particularly permissive parent. My Mum was quite easy going but then I was quite a responsible teen (old head on young shoulders type thing), so it was fair, IYSWIM.

I live in a city now, in a suburban area and my kids DS1 (12yrs) & DS2 (10.5yrs) are reined in more. Mainly because they are not particularly mature/responsible. On a school night they can play out (so long as we know where they are) until 7.30pm (bed at 9.30), on a non school night it is 8.30pm (bed whenever, subject to behaviour). DD is almost 2 (Aug 8th) and so with her it's not something we have to worry about yet. The boys have bikes and have been taught very comprehensive road sense, so they pretty much cycle everywhere they want to go on our large estate. If they want to go further then they have to be driven.

There are quite a few kids in our street who are playing out til quite late (7/8/9 yr olds out until 9.45-10pm), which I don't particularly agree with. The worst was a family (who have recently sold up and moved on), who were very nice lower middle class types, they have a 3 year old son and he would very often be found out playing with the 7/8/9 yr olds until 9.30 -10pm on a week night !!! My 10 & 12 year old have been in bed for half an hour at 10pm weeknights !!!

Thought I should add that we were in a very "douce" suburb of Glasgow and it was the 60s/early 70s (I'm 43).

I also had a key from the last year of primary school as my Mum worked full time, so I'd be alone in the house from around 4.00 - 5.30pm.

I'm 22 so my example is the 1990's.

We didn't really have the concept of "playing out". We were either at our house or a friends, yes we used to go out from there but not until we were 12 or 13.

We did used to go fishing, my brother and I, from about aged 5 (him) and 7(me), we would get up at 4am and go and catch fish for breakfast.

Also we would go off together up the lanes on our bicycles for hours and hours and no-one ever minded.

However we were always home for dinner and never even considered going out afterwards.

We lived in a very quiet cul-de-sac, and there were a few same aged kids, and we used to 'play out' in the street from being about 5 I think, till 8 or 8.30. But, I wouldn't let ds do that at 5 now, even though our road is really quiet.

sorry, that should be from age 5 till 8.30 pm.

tricky one.... I didn't have much freedom as a child and at the time I didn't understand why... I played in the back garden only and was only allowed to the post box on my bike which was about 50m away!! A lot of freedom came at once when I was older - in the sixth form and then leaving home for Uni - and consequently I wasn't prepared for it really looking back!
With DD (5) I am very protective with her. She plays in the back garden only, much to her annoyance as a lot of her friends play in the front, something that I will not allow. This however is probably a sign of the times. I am 38 so grew up in a time (mainly 70s)that was possibly more 'safe' and certainly less cars on the road, nowadays we are constantly reminded of the stranger dangers and there's an enormous increase in the number of cars on the road too. I know that the numbers of children abducted/molested are extremely low, but I am not prepared to take the chance personally.

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None! Freedom for my 6 and 3 year old dd's is going to the postbox which we can see from Nanas front door! They can play in the back garden for as long as they like but are the only children in my row not allowed to roam about in the car park etc till all hours.
I cant settle or think straight unless I know where my children are.

son, 4 and a half, plays out on cul de sac till 8.30 to 9. Loads of kids around,quiet road - loves it!