When does it get easier?!

[Yellowmaiden]

My kids are 4 (just started school), 18m and 2m. I spend most of the day feeling frazzled and harassed.

I have a great partner and support and I really do enjoy the kids but.... man, it's hard work.

I am very aware that I live a charmed life and I don't take it for granted. It's just I've had a hard day/week and would welcome encouragement from those who've been there. (Or alternatively, a realistic view of the future so I can prepare myself for the next stages if necessary!)

Am I in the grip of a "hard stage"? Or is it a case of "it doesn't get easier, just hard in different ways"? Some days I just feel like I'm failing ☹️

I am
Not in your position but I do have a 4 year old and 14 month old so understand how sometimes things can be hard. But having an 18 month old and 2 month old is definitely going to be hard! So don’t be too hard on yourself. Once your 18 month old gets a little older and perhaps doesn’t need so much of your attention or starts going to playgroup it will get easier. And in 5 years time they will all be in school that’s what I tell myself anyway!

I've got 5dc.

In my experience, it gets easier once the youngest is 3. It stops being so physical and all consuming.

Mine are 17, 14, 9, 7 and 4.

Teenagers are far easier than toddlers in my opinion although they do share lots of features! I had years of people telling me, just wait until they're teenagers! You think it's hard now! They were wrong in my opinion. Those early years were really, really hard work and although I look back on them with fond memories, I wouldn't go back there. (Maybe just a day each of newborn days to smell them one more time!)

I home ed the youngest 3 so it isn't related to them starting nursery or school and having time away from them. They just get less full-on.

Small children are hard work. Most people struggle some days. You are not failing.

Mine are
5,4 and 21 months
It's getting easier now as my oldest two are at school so 9-3 mon-Fri is just with my toddler .
Hang in there .
I had a 13 month old and a newborn and remember it well

I have 16m age gap between DS1 and DS2, it’s mad. It got better when DS2 started walking confidently but before OMG the carnage, I thought I would die of exhaustion. You’re very courageous. What helped me was: great friends in same situation, routine, helpful partner who would occasionally come back early prompted by texts like “I’m going to kill one come back NOW”

Thank you so much for the replies, they've really cheered me up. It's nice to know I'm not alone - I mean I knew that anyway, I don't live underground......but sometimes it's nice to hear it.

When DC2 was born I just used to pack a bag and go out for the day as normal with both kids. But for some reason every outing feels like a major expedition now, and some days it's just harder to find the motivation! Just getting coats on, nappies changed, someone falls asleep, then they all need a poo, blah blah....aargh! By the time I get out the door it's time to come home! Most days I can laugh about it, others I'm ready to get on first plane to anywhere I can turn off my phone and drink gin without having to wipe someone's arse every 45 mins whilst also fielding said child's head from other child's feet/random flying objects.

chuffing & skippy ; yes I suppose there will be a time when I am not at home full time with two little ones....for some reason I sort of forgot that.

happy 5 children? 3 home edition? You must be wonder woman! And thanks for the encouragement re teenagers. And yes, I felt my eldest was much easier from 3yrs old so I'll remember that.

Biboundeo Your post really made me smile!

(*home ed - not home edition🙄)

I only have the one so am underqualified to comment, but i remember noting that life got much better at 15 months when walking and language were both better established, got better again at 18 months, and was unrecognisably better at 2 than it had been at 1. She's now 2.5 and despite all the "ooh, just you wait until the toddler tantrum stage, it's MUCH worse" doom-mongers, life is lovely now.I think the baby stage is so so hard, but it does pass