I returned to work when my baby was 9 months she is my 3rd and last. I’m struggling with anxiety, some of that anxiety is existing but a lot is due to being away from my baby. I’ve always been clear that going to work is important and had a good work life balance. I could deal with the parent guilt, because of the life I was able to provide for my kids because of work.
2 years ago I lost a family member to cancer (the start of my anxiety) and since then I feel my priorities have changed, Work means nothing to me... only being with my kids is important. I know my loved one was not on his death bed wishing they had worked more or had more money.
I spend every day at work pining for my baby, if I’m honest I don’t like that she is having fun without me, that I don’t see her development ( I know that’s unreasonable but I can’t stop feeling like
This). when I’m not with her I feel sick to my stomach.
My husband has told me to leave my job if it makes me happy but I feel so conflicted. We plan to move to a nicer area in two years, with better schools, I have a pension and I dont think my husband knows how much I provide for our kids (clothes, clubs,spends and presents) those things aren’t important to me but they are to my kids
It doesn’t help that after I returned to work I was made redundant from my job that I loved and have found a new job which I don’t like
I’m taking medication for the anxiety and have lost about 10lb just though feeling stressed. I just feel stuck between a rock and a hard place and I don’t know what to do