Does anyone record everything their baby does?

[elmo1980]

Ever since ds was 4 days old I've kept a note book listing how much milk he's had and when, what type of nappies (poo or wet) and when, how many naps and length of them etc then totted up the total each day.

It started off as a way of feeling in control and I still find it useful to do 10 months later.

However, my friends and family are worried it's too obsessive and say it's time I stopped this 'nonsense'.

I'm expecting baby no2 and I suspect I will start a new notebook for him/her when they arrive and who knows when I'll stop with ds.

I really don't see it as a problem but interested to know if other people keep the same kind of log about their babies or is it a bit weird?

I think I did that for about a month with DS1 because he'd lost a lot of weight and been hospitalised, and so I was tracking that he was having enough milk and nappies etc. This would have started when he was a few days ol, and lasted about 4 weeks.

Tbh I'm not sure why you find it itself if there are no health concerns? I mean why does it matter how long he's napped in the day/how many wet nappies you've changed?

Itself = useful

I'm expecting baby no2 and I suspect I will start a new notebook for him/her when they arrive and who knows when I'll stop with ds

I know when you’ll stop with DS!

What do you use the information for?
Does it take up a lot of your time and mental energy?
Does it make you feel in control when you feel anxious?

There is no good reason to do this and it is very likely to be a symptom of anxiety.

DD has stomach problems so I need to record that sort of stuff for her, although I do it for all of my dc just in case anything happens to them I’m able to look at my notes and see that they’ve had something different to eat. Although I only started once dd got diagnosed with stomach problems so I guess that’s just me being cautious.

I did it using an app when DD was born, to help me keep track as I felt in a bit of a daze. But I stopped after a few weeks as I felt I was falling into a routine.

I don’t think it’s necessary to do it but if it helps you then why not. Although if it gets to the stage where you would get in a state without it then possibly you would need to consider if it was a problem.

If your baby is reasonably healthy then honestly it is a bit odd. When you say it's useful, in what way does it benefit you? Surely you just get anxious if Day X's numbers are 'less good' than Day Y's?

I've done this for about eight months now, since DD was a day or two old. I use an app (glow baby) though. I just like seeing the patterns evolve over time. I'm also crap at remembering the last nappy/feed. I am not an obsessive person, although I do like a good data set.

If you think it's useful or interesting and doesn't cause you additional worry then I wouldn't worry what others think.

I think if it's not causing you any extra hassle then what's the prob? If you leave him with someone for the day and expect them to write it all down too that might be a problem, or if you'd feel anxious if you couldn't for some reason.

I used an app called "eat sleep" to log stuff like that for a few months, helped me get an idea of how long was normal for breast feeding sessions and some kind feeling of control about sleep

Isn't a bit, erm, boring?

There are no health problems and he's kept a steady rate of growth albeit slightly big for his age.

If I don't write down what he's done within a few minutes of him doing it I do get a bit panicky then once it's written down I relax.

It's been useful for noticing patterns in his behaviour (he's recently dropped his afternoon feed for example) or if he's grumpy in the afternoon I'll check the book and realise I left it a bit long after his morning nap so I Should put him down.

It's almost like I don't trust myself to do the right thing but if I follow the book he will be ok.

When I've left him with my dp or dm they are always left with instructions to complete the book on my absence!

I also like to look back over the previous months to see how he's changed.

Maybe it is a bit odd after reading all that but I really don't think I could stop doing it, although as pp said it could well be second baby that knocks it on the head!

I never did this on paper but I mentally did this with all my DCs for most of the first year. I think lots of mums do. The times and lengths of feeds, naps and nappies. At any one time I could rhyme off that day and probably a summary of the day before.
So I’d say if you feel better doing it then fine, it sounds like if you write it down you can feel more relaxed, as long as it is not a source of worry.

So you think it's anxiety driven or interest driven?

It's good if you find it reassuring but if you freak out about "missing" data, them maybe you're over depending on it?

Tbh I think it’s a bit much as it’s unnecessary, however I don’t think it needs to be a symptom of something else. Some people are just more practical than others.

I know a woman from my slimming World group who took her book home and literally covered it in post it’s with little notes on it. I on the other hand didn’t even read mine. Neither of us are wrong or have a disorder. We are just different.

It sounds as though you're doing it to keep anxiety at bay, but that it's now become a source of anxiety in itself, so perhaps it would be better to try to wean yourself off it and rather trust your instincts as to whether baby is tired, hungry etc. But that's probably easier said than done! Maybe you could substitute a diary of baby firsts instead, if you don't record these milestones already - first time he crawls, first tooth, first word etc. These will at least be interesting to look back on. I wish I'd done that with my children - now I can't remember who did what, when.

i do find this odd - sorry. and frankly i’ve no idea how you manage it! i’m run ragged with my 7mo! we kept a log for the first 2-3 days as the MW asked for it. gave my partner something to do! my log is my photo stream, all 6000 of them..

I do the same and have done since my DS was born he’s now 7 months old and I will be doing it until he is much older it’s handy for me because when he’s had bad days from teething or under the weather it helps me track how much he’s had and how many days it’s affected him ignore your family he’s your DS do what you feel is best nothing obsessive with it handy to have this information to hand should you ever need it for doctors visits health visitor visits etc

Op try to think about the tens of thousands of years that humans brought up babies without routines written in books or apps to record everything....

I think having to write down bowel movements and nap times of a 10 month old seems anxious to me and as though you dont trust your natural mothering instinct.

I never wrote down anything or had much of a routine but i was capable of working out if they had had a short nap or were over tired etc. As im sure you are able to without your notes.

Also its important to remember that a baby being tired or grumpy or having a short nap is essentially not a big deal and you dont need to constantly monitor it. This will become more apparent to you once you have a second child.

I did but only up until about 10 weeks

If it's not a hassle to do it and it makes you feel better then why not?

For me it would have been a bit too much but it's not harming anyone else so I don't see why not.

Could you try cutting down on what you record?

I used an app for my twins. I logged nappies, feeds, medicine, baths, mealtimes...

Twin 1 has been quite ill on and off this year, so the data has been useful for hospital admissions, noticing patterns of vomiting/tummy problems etc

I only stopped last month when T1 had a very serious illness and was on a ventilator etc and I didn't see T2 for days at a time. The girls are 18 months old.

For me, logging was definitely a help with my anxiety/PND/PTSD, which I was diagnosed with when my girls were born at 26 weeks gestation. They were really poorly and it was an awful 16 weeks. Logging made me feel more in control.

It wouldn’t be an issue if it wasn’t for the fact that you get panicky if you can’t right down what he does.
I’m sorry but this sounds like obsessive compulsive behaviour and does need to be tackled.
How would you feel about trying to increase the gaps between observing the behaviour and recording it. Do you think you could do it?