Separated from 7 week old - hand hold please

[user1509178620]

Gave birth to my beautiful DD 7 weeks ago - first time mum. Started getting chest pains about 4 weeks ago and developed jaundice yesterday. Admitted to hospital and diagnosed with gallstones. Waiting for a scan to determine course of action, but it will most likely be an op to remove my gallbladder.

I've been in hospital for nearly 24 hours now and miss my baby so much. The staff here are great and willing to relax visiting hours for her and DH, but I'm worried about the risk of her catching something if she comes in - she's so little and vulnerable. But I'm also worried about the effects of being separated from me for so long. DH says she keeps looking around, confused - doing a sad cry for no obvious reason and being particularly clingy with him. It breaks my heart to think of her like that. Does she think I abandoned her? I'm terrified this will cause her attachment issues. Please help!

Oh love didn't want to read and run! The exact same thing happened to me when DD was 4 weeks old! I was in for nearly 3 weeks as op kept getting cancelled. My DM used to bring DD to the hospital cafe for an hour so I could get cuddles. Honestly baby will be fine with daddy. Please stop worrying and concentrate on getting yourself better to get home to her! Gallstones are no joke and will only get worse if you leave them. Hopefully you will be sorted very soon! Good luck and please try not to worry about your baby

Sorry also no attachment issues, DD was absolutely fine with my mum and we are extremely close now! She's 11.

Thanks zigzag - very reassuring to hear from someone who's been in the same position. 3 weeks - wow! That must have been so tough for you! I'm glad there were no lasting effects.

Since I'm lucky enough to be in a private room, DH and I have decided that he'll bring her in for a quick visit. Can't wait to see them - just hope it doesn't coincide with my scan.

Just get plenty of sleep in preparation for going home!! It will be lovely to have a quick visit just try not to get too upset when she leaves! My DM said she felt like a Social Worker trying to get DD off me following a visit But believe me she will be fine with daddy xx

Please don’t worry, I know it’s really tough but I was in the opposite situation with my baby in special care after she was born and I was separated from her quite a bit but it’s caused no issues and her attachment to me is great.

I'm in just now for gall bladder issues and there are 2 mums and babies on the ward in side rooms. Can you not keep baby with you until they decide to operate?

Thanks all - really appreciate your kind words. Scan showed that I don't need the op urgently, so they let me go home yesterday and I'll be scheduled in as an outpatient. I've got medication to help in the mean time.

It was lovely to be reunited with DD - lots of cuddles! She's a bit clinger than usual, but otherwise her normal self, and she seems to have developed a closer bond with DH in my absence too, so that's great!

Jazz - They would have allowed it, but she's bottle fed on special formula and it would have been hard to prepare it and clean / sterilise the bottles on the ward - without bringing in loads of equipment from home, at least. Sorry to hear that you're also suffering - hope you get the treatment you need quickly and can go home soon!

Oh, poor you. Don't worry about attachment - that is more to do with a baby not being able to be sure her needs will be met but as long as she is with Daddy (or Granny etc) she will be getting cuddled when she cries, fed when she needs and changed and kept warm and at 7 weeks that is what matter. She will realise you aren't there and be a bit puzzled and unsettled but it won't cause any lasting problems.