How is it having four? Shall we go for a fourth one?

[Mum8]

I Have three kids age 3, 5 years and a 7 month, I thought this was it for us as I’m also 39 and even gave away baby things to friends. I started feeling though like I could have a forth one too and feeling broody 😳 I had gestational diAbetes with my third one which I successfully managed with diet and my second child’s Labour was not easy although all was good in the end. Also developed diastasis recti with each pregnancy which I managed through physio and without issues afterwards
Did anyone have a fourth child? Late in age as well with about two year or small gaps between little ones. How is it? I will be 40 early next year so if I had a fourth it will not be earlier than at least 41 years... love kids and four will be more balanced but not sure about burden it can bring to the family with another pregnancy and Labour etc...

www.nhs.uk/conditions/gestational-diabetes/pages/Introduction.aspx#effects

See long term effects section.

Thank you Cheminotte, I was aware of these risks, very informative site, just not that it was the cause of diabetes for like but rather an indicators of your risk... helpful tips know that x

Meant for life of course, not like...

I think it depends a lot on the characters of the children you have, and the potential 4th!

I am very pleased to feel content with my 3 and also at my limit.

Dc3 is 2.4 now and I would say that it's early days with your third. I definitely found it easier having '2 children & a baby' rather than 3 children (or 2 children & a toddler).

Also what about getting back to work/career? You'll be pushing that back another few years.

Only you know your own capabilities and limits but I wouldn't make the decision based on how things are now with your youngest being only 7 months.

You seem to be thinking about this with your heart and not your head.

Do you have enough house room, car space? What about holidays? What if your 4th has extra needs, doesn't enjoy robust good health? Will you be able to give all of your children enough individual attention?

Just because you want another child isn't enough to justify it. You said you had to "persuade" your husband for number 3. What does he say about number 4? Are you prepared to have another and not get the support you require from him because he doesn't want another?

Sadly, I know a few women who persuaded their husband to have a baby/another baby, and their husbands have just distanced themselves from childcare, their argument being "well you wanted this child, I didn't"

Thank you Tankerdale, I wish I will feel as content as you and once DD2 grows a little, I see how full and bubbly our house will be. I was driving DD1 and DS out to play today and I was enjoying them being so cute and bubbly and I thought once DD2 can join, maybe I will feel I do have a big enough family with their personalities. Will definitely not rush in having a fourth if I decided that...
LoniceraJaponica that is so true, I am going with my heart to decide on DC4 and yes logic is needed. Luckily DH is a hands on person and have been so lucky to have him in my life,grateful for that. But the house is fine for us and financially we somehow managed, the universe has been generous so far... But I do need to think our sanity as well and my health, that is a big one. Will wait before I decide anything on this...

My view may be clouded by the fact dc3 is in the midst of the twos and she is more mischievous, energetic and strong willed than her big sisters ever were, plus a worse sleeper! (And she was an easy baby so did not see that coming!)

Tankerdale that sounds like DS, really easy baby like DD2 but since 2-3 years old, very cheeky and naughty, wonder what DD2 will bring. Guess they do learn more earlier from older siblings...

mum8 yes I do to a degree. I was always worried about middle child syndrome. Mine pair up a lot - but those pairs shift all the time. Sometimes it’s the two eldest and the two youngest. Then the oldest/youngest and the middle two. Then the singing two and the swimming two....the ice-cream-aholics, the chocoholics.... It’s a wonderful thing to see and I am so happy for them that they have their siblings. Most of the time!