Struggling, please help

[houseRefurb]

DD is 6.5 yrs old;

Getting out of bed in the morning has always been an issue. We have always been late to school (I feel like a complete failure here..)

I have tried everything that I can think of: Reward charts, threats, talking to the teacher, talking nicely while she is in bed contemplating on when to get out of the bed...talking when things are calm, talking just before bed...I have even offered the treat of watching CBeebies for a bit if she gets ready...

She sleeps well, last night, she was asleep by 8.40, but this morning, she didn't want to get out of bed even at 8.10; we have to leave home by 8.25 at the latest to get to school on time.

I have to literally physically drag her out of bed...(which isn't pleasant for anyone involved) ...And that sets her off into an even bad mood...This is what happened this morning..And she went off on this this tirade against me of how horrible a mum I am and she wants to get a new one ...

I just feel like a total failure here...

My son is a lot younger than this so I may be wrong but going to sleep at 8.40pm sounds quite late to me? Could you try an earlier bedtime? Sorry if you've already tried this.

Can you try involving her in the solution? This is suggested in that book How to talk so kids can listen.

You sit down together and agree what the problem is together ( being late for school due to getting out of bed late). You could perhaps talk through why this is a problem. I tell my son that I get told off if I am late for work!
Then you go through all possible solutions. You have to write down everything that your child suggests at this point, not matter how unrealisitic it is to implement. then once all the ideas are down you go through them one by one and cross of the ones that won't work, each of you get to have a say here. The idea is that you can then agree on a workable solution together so that the child is invested in it too.

Worth a try, maybe?!

(Or does she need to go to bed a bit earlier too?)

Put her to bed much earlier. She needs at least 11 hours sleep.

I like barmouth's suggestion.
Also agree with earlier bedtime. At that age, mine were going to bed by 7.30 at the latest.

I tried everything then I used to play DS's favourite song in the morning and he had to get dressed in time before the song finished "show me the way to Amarillo" brings me right back to that time!

I'd suggest earlier to bed. My ds who is 6 is asleep before 8. If he ever goes to sleep later hE won't wake up till after 8.

Thanks a lot e'one for your replies. She is in bed by 7.30-7.45 pm. Then after all the story reading, talking after the lights are off etc she is usually asleep by 8.30 ish; I will try bringing that back by an hour.

barmouthdreams, thanks for that. I have the book. Time to dip into it again. Though I have tried this strategy at some point, I will give it another shot. She is very engaged with the whole deal when we are discussing. Its just that when its implementation time, she acts and talks ("I don't care ...") as if none of that stuff matter anymore.

beyondworriedmum, yes, I should take a long deep breath, and tell myself that this too shall pass !

Some kids this age still need 12 hours' sleep; sounds like she's in that category. You need to get her to bed earlier in order to achieve this; you're right, she should be in bed by 6.30ish, lights out by 7.30 at the latest.

There's no point bargaining with her in the mornings, just facilitate the right amount of sleep at the right time.