Family and I moved to this area two years ago. It's pretty rural, down a private lane that we share with one other house which is about 20 metres away from ours. Family in other house seemed lovely - they had a boy a year older than my boy (my boy now 5) and we have both since had dc2's - mine is nearly 2 theirs about 18mo. They were always polite but really kept themselves to themselves and we saw very little of them. My ds has asd and always found their ds quite overwhelming. She was really ill when pregnant with dc2 but never wanted any help (I offered to walk her ds to school, round to play etc always declined). I thought it was a shame we didn't see them more as they did seem lovely but some people are introverts so I left them to it.
In July the husband died in fairly shocking circumstances. The wife and two dc's immediately left to stay with her dc's in Scotland (we're SE England). They returned just before start of term. The wife's dm wrote me a letter (guess she didn't have my number) to say when they were coming back. I had spare keys so went round and did a quick hoover and put some flowers in a case. After they'd been back a few hours I knocked on the door and offered to do all sorts of things (my overriding memory of my dads death is lots of people coming round offering non specific help which you then feel awkward asking for). She just looked so broken. No facial expression whatsoever, lost shedloads of weight. She didn't say anything just looked completely blank and shut the door on me. I've seen the older boy a couple of times at school and he also looks unkempt and just, sad. All this is awful and to be expected when something like this happens I guess, but she seems to be completely on her own here. There's never any cars of visitors in her drive and it's not really walkable from many places.
Anyway, last night I heard her screaming 'I fucking hate you' and 'don't even fucking look at me' again and again. She had a window open but there house is about 20 metres away so she was flat out screaming. It must have been at kids as no pets. Then tonight I heard her screaming again 'go to bed, go to bed, go to fucking bed' and then just sobbing and sobbing.
I feel so sad for her. I mentioned to the school this morning that she seemed to be struggling but they seemed to brush me of a bit as if I was trying to get gossip or something. Should I call SS? I really don't want to get her in trouble or anything but I look at my little boys and the thought of them losing dh and then having me screaming at them just breaks my heart. Should I try talking to her again?