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Original poster

How long does the phase where your DD refuses to take off her 'princess' outfit and what developmental purpose does being a princess serve if any?

29 replies

Malaleche · 04/04/2007 21:28

I have daily struggles to persuade DD1 3.5 yo,who thinks she is a princess, to take off her 'long dress' (a dressing-up item) when it's time to go out or to bed. Sometimes I hide it for a few days but then feel sorry for her and allow it to reappear. Do all litle girls go through this highly irritating phase? Does it serve any purpose in the developement of her self-image? Will I stunt her developement if I refuse to go along with it?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TrinityRhino · 04/04/2007 21:30

let her wear it to go out and to bed and she may tire of it

Josie3 · 04/04/2007 21:31

What's wrong with her wearing it?

clayre · 04/04/2007 21:31

it's more irritating when it ds! i thnk it's more irritating listening to her constantaly asking for the dress than her actually wearing it, but the phase doesnt last long.

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Moomin · 04/04/2007 21:33

I'd just let her get on with it if i were you. Most little ones go through something similar to this - sometimes it's to do with clothes, sometimes it's objects that they take everywhere. It's to do with control apparently - they've just realised at this age that they can control a part of their life and it gives them security and a sense of self. They grow out of it eventually. My little brother wore a soldier's uniform every day for about 6 months when he was about 4. The fmaily just started calling him Bilko but at that age we didn't know what it meant! He also took a stick everywhere for ages. It came on holiday with us! On the same tack, dd1 refused to wear trousers from the age of 2 and half for 10 months. I was annoyed to start with bu then let it go.

RedLorryYellowLorry · 04/04/2007 21:36

DD who is now 6.6 yo lived in one particular Princess Dress for the entire year of being 3 yo I remember - it rotted off her in the end. She still loves dressing up in pink and frills and anything remotely to do with Princes and Princesses and falling in bloody love, getting married and happy ever afters!! Her teacher told me not to tell her real life is nothing like it . Ds 4.6 yo was a ballerina today complete with pink shoes so I have far more important worries than dd becoming Barbara Cartland at the moment

PinkTulips · 04/04/2007 21:40

i think i'd prefer a princess dress to the ratty unwashab;e bear that gets dragged everywhere and randomly dumped in;
freezers in supermarket
ball pit at soft play
sink at playschool
toilet at playschool
given to stray dogs

did i mention it's unwashable?

Original poster

Malaleche · 04/04/2007 21:49

TrinityRhino - yes, maybe i should MAKE her wear it ALL the time [evil smiley]
Josie3 - what's wrong is we live in a conservative Spanish town where people just dont let their kids go out looking 'odd'. I'm tired of standing out for being foreign to start with without getting bonus funny looks from the immaculately turned out locals and their identikit children!
Moomin - DD1 also refuses to wear trousers, it's been about 6 months now, only when threatened with not being taken to a birthday party at an adventure park was she persuaded to put on trousers...
RLYL - DDs dress is starting to rot too and she can only just get the zip up now...She will lie for 20 mins with her eyes shut waiting for prince charming to come and kiss her, she would rather marry me tho!

OP posts:

Original poster

Malaleche · 04/04/2007 21:51

pinktulips - Wash it! 'Oh, dear what a shame, something terrible has happened to your bear!'

OP posts:

Original poster

Malaleche · 04/04/2007 21:51

But did little girls pretend to be princesses all this time before the advent of Disney?

OP posts:

PinkTulips · 04/04/2007 21:53

eeek... my life would not be worth living!

i put him in a delicate cycle once but he's defitely looking the worse for it and it didn't get off any of the really glues on gunk anyway.

i've taken to dressing bear in ds's newborn clothes which can be washed

got ome funny look when she and bear staerted playschool as he was wearing a nappy and babygro!

Spidermama · 04/04/2007 21:53

I think if I lived in the kind of place where people looked critically at a little girl wearing a princess dress I would be very keen to move somewhere civilised.

My ds is now five and still loves to dress as a princess whenever he can.

oliveoil · 04/04/2007 21:57

dd2 wears a mermaid stretchy top on her head

if it gets me round the shops without tantrums, bring it on

CarGirl · 04/04/2007 21:58

dd3 has a different dress up outfit on every school run and at the weekend often several changes per day!

PinkTulips · 04/04/2007 21:58

sorry... typing worse than usual tonight

hunkermunker · 04/04/2007 21:58

at a bear in a nappy

PinkTulips · 04/04/2007 21:59

a cotton nappy of course

Spidermama · 04/04/2007 22:00

I'll always remember ds1 at Gatwick airport dressed as a dragon. He made people smile everywhere he went. I think dressing up is so fantastic and they don't do it for long. It's a time to treasure. They're transported into a fantasy world in a way we can't remember. Watch and enjoy.

foxinsocks · 04/04/2007 22:00

my dd is still a dresser upper (and she's 6.5). She LOVED all that lark - in fact, her reception teacher used to say that she had only just turned around, having done the register, and dd would be in her knickers and diving into the dressing up box .

Just go with the flow.

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 04/04/2007 22:03

Course they did Malaleche... there were always fairy tales..

imaginaryfriend · 04/04/2007 22:12

My dd's a bit of a goth so she doesn't do the whole princess thing at all, in fact, once we went to a princess party and I bought her a dress she said she would wear but 10 minutes in she was begging to take it off.

But her very best friend (aged 5) is the most princessy of pink princesses I've ever seen and although I agree that it's great to dress up etc., it's a bit of a nightmare for her mum. She insists on wearing a Sleeping Beauty dress anywhere and everywhere, it's covered in stains from meal times (won't take it off to eat), ragged round the bottom from dragging on the floor etc. She's freezing in winter as she won't go out with a coat on top of it, and boiling in summer as it's lined and long-sleeved. She wears it to the park and can't play properly or climb the slides. She wears it to parties and nobody ever comes up to her anymore and says 'you look lovely' because she's always looking exactly the same. The only other clothes she wears are her school uniform items. She's worn it to weddings. Well, you name it.

I find it a bit of a shame because the magic of dressing up seems to have become very unmagical, and because she's such a sweet and gorgeous little girl.

But she's got princess fever. What can you do?

Original poster

Malaleche · 04/04/2007 22:15

Feel a bit , of course i shouldnt let my hang-ups spoil her fun...
It really annoys me tho that she has a dressing up box FULL of lovely things and wont wear anything but the manky dress...!

OP posts:

Josie3 · 04/04/2007 22:16

I think tbh I'd just be giving in and buying a second dress - so that at least you have a chance to wash the original!

How about wearing a tiara with wand or something when she's out - a nice compromise? Seems a shame to discourage a largely unoptrusive (sp?) love.

TeeCee · 04/04/2007 22:20

My DD was adament she was wearing her princess dress to the science museum. So i let her. I just put her jeans and l/slv t-shirt on under it so when she got annoyed with this mad long pink swishy dress I could whip it off her with no fuss or bother.
She wears it whenever she asks to wear it.
I've always thoguth it looked really sweet when i see boys dressed as spiderman when we are out and same with girls being dressed up.

When I was little my mum let me wear this nightie thing that I thought was really grown up and sexy, with her heeled boots and some beads to post a fake letter in the next road! I went on my own and felt utterly fabulous. I love her still for letting me do that!

princesscc · 04/04/2007 22:21

I don't understand the problem really, I think its perfectly acceptable to be a princess!(I AM a princess and I will never stop believing!) 39 btw.

cori · 04/04/2007 22:21

Well, I don't know about development phases of little girls today (as I have two DS) but when i was a little there not many fairy princess outfits around, but at night I would lay in bed and imagine I was a princess that lived in a castle, I slept in a big four poster bed and had a tidy room (which of course i never did). I loved my little fantasy. Now if i ever feel a bit down when I am going to bed I pretend i am a princess again and it always makes me feel better.

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