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Parenting

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Feeling like a failure....

1 reply

Feb09 · 13/09/2017 22:48

My dd is 8 and for the last year or so she has been acting like a brat and spoilt. I have been trying my best to be the best mom I can be but I always feel inferior, I try not to (although it's hard) to compare myself to other moms but I do feel like I have spoilt my dd and now I'm not sure how to un-do the damage!!
I have had a partner for 4 years now and he isn't her dad, but he helps bring her up the only problem is it's different to how I want!! His diet is poor and he doesn't encourage her to eat healthy food and doesn't listen to me when I mention anything he just thinks I'm nagging. It's frustrating because although I appreciate his help both financially and in other ways I don't think it's doing her any good!!!
He often buys her things, even when she hasn't done anything in particular to deserve them.
He's totally spoiling her, he makes excuses for her behaviour and makes me look like the bad parent pretty much all of the time. He's not consistent with rules and boudanries.
Is it too late?
What can I do to make him see that it isn't good for her in the long run?
Has anyone else made else been through a similar experience? Any advice will be greatly appreciated 😀

OP posts:
Smurfy23 · 15/09/2017 23:03

First of all you're not a failure!

Its not too late at all. Have you spoken to DP and explained your concerns about DD getting spoiled and her diet? Has he said why he keeps buying gifts for her? My initial reaction would be to ask is he trying to over compensate for not being her biological dad? Understandable if so but not hugely helpful.

What about a rewards based system for good behaviour? That way shes still getting rewarded but having to earn it?

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