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Parenting

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Original poster

To dummy or not to dummy

25 replies

Lenl · 31/08/2017 15:44

DS1, now two years old, had a dummy from 4 months old. I took it cold turkey at about 22 months as the tantrums if he couldn't find one were outweighing the soothing benefits. We had a couple of very tearful days then it was over. It was a bit of a contentious thing though as after about 12 months old he just had it all the time. I think we missed a window with him where he was less attached and we could have got rid more easily.

Anyway DS2 is now 10 weeks old and starting to show signs of being a thumb sucker. I wonder if I should introduce a dummy at these times as at least this can be taken away whereas a thumb sucking habit can be hard to break much further into childhood once adult teeth are coming through etc. We were going to try and avoid a dummy this time unless we started to go insane and had exhausted other means of soothing it seemed necessary for him. I'm not against them necessarily and think they can be nice for babies really it's just having to take it away later on.

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Original poster

Lenl · 31/08/2017 15:45

Pressed post duh. Question is would you choose a dummy over thumb sucking?

OP posts:

Changerofname987654321 · 31/08/2017 15:48

Yes.

Barkingtrees · 31/08/2017 15:51

Dummy over thumb .
You can't take a thumb away

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BoredOnMatLeave · 31/08/2017 15:51

Yes, I was very anti-dummy until DD came along. Now I would 100% choose a dummy over thumb

chloechloe · 31/08/2017 19:53

I would give him a dummy. I only ever give them for falling asleep though and then I don't think it's such an issue. I can't stand it though when toddlers walk around all day with the damn thing in their mouth.

Our 2.5 yo still has hers to sleep but I can't face trying to wean her off it as we have an 8mo who has one too.

Newmumtobabyno1 · 31/08/2017 21:01

Yes to dummy - boys tend to be more 'sucky' apparently, haha.

Gave DS one to settle him and to stop him using my boob as a dummy when he was in sleepy newborn stage. From 16 weeks I started only giving it for naps and nighttime which has worked great - its his comforter (instead of toy/blanket etc) and signals to him its sleep time now.

Yes I got judged, mostly by family members, but I don't care.

HTH

Iamthestorm · 31/08/2017 21:06

My son had one from newborn and gave it up himself at 4 months. He's never sucked his thumb but at 20 months still sucks a corner of his muslin...now that's grim!

Ellieboolou27 · 31/08/2017 21:08

Yes to dummy!
I was very anti dummy (don't know why) before dd1 came along, she was hospitalised at 6 days old and the midwife suggested I try a dummy as she never settled, EVER!
She had dummy until she was almost 4 only at bed.
Dd2 is almost 2 and still has dummy a lot, I really don't have an issue with them now. I think they should be gone once they start nursery. Dummies were and are the holy grail to me now!

I don't care who judges, or what my friends say, my kids and I know what works, both have great speech.

DragonsandDungeons · 31/08/2017 21:09

Why are dummies even controversial?

Yes give him one. I desperately tried to get DS to take one and he wouldn't.

Paris1986 · 31/08/2017 21:14

Slightly different perspective here as I don't have any DC yet. I sucked my thumb (parents were massively against dummies for some reason) until I was about ten. Eventually stopped cos I started boarding school so forced myself so I didn't get picked on! Anyway, I also had years of orthodontal work which would no doubt have been avoided if I'd not spent the majority of my childhood pushing my top teeth forward. Cost thousands. That's enough to choose a dummy over a thumb any day!

SherbertLemon2011 · 31/08/2017 21:14

My fried has a VERY sore thumb with dry skin because she still (in her 20s) often sucks her thumb to get to sleep without realising that is what she is doing or sometimes sucks her thumb when she is asleep. I would choose a dummy every time!

SleepingBooty · 31/08/2017 21:19

Dummy every time. Our rule was only for bedtime, always helped the routine. Having grown up with friends who had misshapen thumbs or buck teeth, it seems like a simple option.

usernameavailable · 31/08/2017 21:29

I may be the only one who would choose thumb.
I have both, a thumb sucker and a dummy user.
My dummy user, was able to play with her dummy in mouth, she would wake up and cry until dummy was found through the night.
My thumb sucker has to take thumb out of mouth to play, she only puts it in to sleep and as soon as she would drop off her thumb would come out. If she woke up she wouldn't fully wake and cry so she settled straight back off and thumb would soon be out of mouth once asleep.
My dummy users teeth are not as straight as my thumb suckers.
I think I got a bit lax with the dummy though. So i let Dd have it throughout day and play whilst its in her mouth.

LexieLulu · 31/08/2017 21:31

Yes to dummies, used on both of my children but removed around the 1 year mark as I find it easier than when they get a proper attachment to them xx

PhilMitchellDeflating · 31/08/2017 21:37

I was very much anti dummy, hated seeing toddlers wandering around with them.
As a newborn, DS was constantly snaffling for food, wasn't breast fed for numerous reasons and we were constantly making up bottles that he didn't really want so gave in to a dummy.

He's 18 months now and quite reliant on it, nursery only give it to him at naps but as soon as he gets home he screams for one.

We are slowly weaning him off his dummy and he doesn't have it while walking around outside.

Same as PP, I was a thumb sucker which caused so many problems growing up. Years of orthodontic work and a permanently deformed palate caused by my thumb moulding it. Wouldn't say I'm pro dummy per se, but for me it was a more preferable option.

troodiedoo · 31/08/2017 21:42

My now 17 yo was a thumb sucker. Have a scan of her doing in in womb. Her teeth and thumb are totally fine.

CaptWentworth · 31/08/2017 21:54

I was a thumb-sucker. Had several years of orthodontic input as a child including painful straightening. Dummy all the way. If only DS would take one

CaptWentworth · 31/08/2017 21:56

My thumb has also never looked the same...

BackforGood · 31/08/2017 21:58

Yes to dummy, but yes to dummy for going to sleep, not for walking around with it in mouth throughout the day.

house12345 · 31/08/2017 22:17

We never gave our baby a dummy but he doesn't suck his thumb too much either, just sometimes when he's tired. Seems ok so far.. I just couldn't be bothered with trying to take it away

Caterina99 · 01/09/2017 15:16

DS had a dummy from a few days old. Best thing ever as it was a guaranteed sleep prop as a baby and toddler. We weaned him off it recently at nearly 2. It was 3 horrible days, but he was fine once it was done. 3 days v nearly 2 years of the dummy being an instant comfort.

DC2 is due soon and I plan to do the same thing

InDubiousBattle · 01/09/2017 15:20

Yes to the dummy, they are fantastic sleep aides and are cheap, easily replaced, small, washable and not attached to your body! I know fully grown adults who still occasionally suck their thumbs.

InDubiousBattle · 01/09/2017 15:21

They're also linked to a reduced SIDS risk.

SuburbanRhonda · 01/09/2017 15:25

If he's "showing signs of being a thumb sucker", why not just wait until he actually starts and then give him a dummy?

DS looked like he was going to suck his thumb but didn't - and neither did he need a dummy.

Original poster

Lenl · 01/09/2017 19:23

Thanks for the replies. Looks like mumsnet consensus is dummy is better.

"Showing signs" wasn't really the right term to use, he just had started sucking his thumb. His age means he can't always aim his hand yet but he tries and tries til he's got his thumb then goes for it

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