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My 22 month old biting at nursery

4 replies

Maybe2014 · 30/08/2017 20:30

My 22 month old keeps biting at nursery and it's really stressing me out because I just can't see how to stop it when it only happens when he's there. It's nearly always a disagreement over a toy and is becoming an almost daily problem. He has friends he plays with of the same age outside of nursery that we see every week and he's never bitten them, if he did I would obviously teach not to do it!
We read him 'teeth are not for biting' every night and I've done many hours of late night googling but I'm really at a loss how to stop it. I've asked the staff a few times to shadow him but I think after a day it two of no incidents they must just let him get on with it and it happens again.
There's now a mum I see most mornings who gives me filthy looks and loudly made comments to another mum when I was getting in the car about him not being nice, I'm guessing she was talking about my son.
I feel awful for her, her child and all the other children he's bitten, I understand why she is angry and probably thinks he's a thug and I just let him do it. I feel ashamed that I can't see how to fix it.. I stress about it regularly and I sometimes don't feel proud of my son which is a horrible way to feel.
Other than the biting he's a really loving and fun child. The staff say he's really good and does play nicely he just gets fixated over certain toys and gets impatient.
Is there anything more I can do?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
starpatch · 30/08/2017 21:17

Flowers. Much sympathy to you I've been the parent of a biter and it's really difficult. It's so common at that age and they do grow out of it and no there is nothing you can do- he is too young to follow your advice when you are not there so it's really up to the nursery to deal with it. If you were really unhappy with the nursery ( in other ways too I mean) you could consider a childminder ?

Maybe2014 · 31/08/2017 09:05

He's really happy at the nursery so I'm not keen on moving him and he'll be moving to the age 2+ building soon, this I fear could be a settling for him and make it worse. I've asked for them to shadow him again today

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Me264 · 31/08/2017 09:09

The nursery shouldn't be telling the parents of the bitee-s that your DS is the biter. That's not fair. Do they have a biting policy? My ds's nursery does, ask to see it and confirm what it says. My DS has been bitten a few times and I do know which child it was once but it honestly doesn't make me think any less of him or his parents, I always just think DS could just as easily be the biter next time. He hasn't bitten anyone yet but we have had a few reports of him getting a bit aggressive and pushing smaller toddlers over which I felt awful about so I do know how you feel.

Are the nursery able to pin point any triggers? Is it always the same toys - can you come up with some strategies with them so that if another child is playing with one of his favourites they distract him with something else he loves.

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Cutesbabasmummy · 06/09/2017 11:33

Once the kids can talk they tell the parents who the biter is...

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