Breastfeeding

[Mrstobe90]

Hi,

I was just reading a small article about breastfeeding and in the comments, a few women said that they wished they had researched it more while pregnant.
I am currently expecting and realised that I don't actually know much about it at all! I just assumed I'd be able to.

So I was wondering if anyone had tips or advice?
Anything would be appreciated

Are you on Facebook, there are lots of good support groups there.
Also, does your local nct group run a bumps and babies group, you'll be able to chat to mum who have/planning on breastfeeding.
There should also be a breastfeeding network group near you, the ladies who volunteer for this are so knowledgeable.
I would say being informed/ doing some research is so important, in the early days it's very easy to think that your baby isn't getting enough because they're seemingly constantly attached, and well meaning friends and relatives are quick to suggest formula.

Sorry, pressed post too soon! Meant to add that we all trust our bodies to nurture our babies when they are growing in our wombs, I just wish more women would trust their bodies to provide for their babies when they arrive. There is a tiny percentage of women who for one reason or other can't feed, but it is only a tiny percent.

4 weeks into BF my first, and I did all that was listed above. The frequency of feeds is tough, and although it shouldn't hurt (and doesn't now) it did to start as you and baby are learning so we had a few bad latches leading to cracked/ bleeding nipples; which then made me cry at the thought of feeding again for the 6th time that night. The lack of sleep has been tough, and I felt pressure to begin with as no one else can feed the baby if BF, but now it feels like an achievement.

I'd stock up on lansinoh, nipple shields and water bottles. I used nipple shields for 24 hours to allow my nipples to heal and it made all the difference between continuing to BF or not.

Make sure you read up about cluster feeding ie, when the baby will just feed for hours on end. It's perfectly normal and doesn't mean you don't have enough milk. It's how you get your supply established. Also remember that a newborn's stomach is about the size of an acorn so they don't need huge amounts of milk all at the one time - it's little and (sometimes very!) often.

Meh. You can research it all you like. Read up about the make of of your milk. How to get a good latch/improve a bad one. Different hold positions. What colour baby's poo should be.

But more than that, you need to make sure you know what support networks there are available to you - local bf groups? Is there a lactation consultant at the hospital you're planning to give birth in? Speak to your midwife or HV next time you see them and ask what support you can expect to receive. Because it's pretty tough to start with. And relentless! Read up on cluster feeding. When your milk comes in. Let down. How and when to express (not recommended until supply is established btw and is no indication of your actual supply. I could barely get 2oz a day).

An awful lot of it is learned on the job really! I had it relatively easy - midwife latched ds on for me minutes after he was born and I ebfd for the first 6 months and am still 'demand feeding' him now at 22mo. But not being able to express much meant it was always down to me. It can feel a bit restricting and claustrophobic at times but for me, totally worth it.

Basically, read some now, find out what support is available for you and don't worry. If things don't work out, formula will be just fine. Good luck!

I researched it to the absolute hilt - went to workshops, read books, watched YouTube videos... after the baby was here, I went to breastfeeding cafes, had the midwife out every day for weeks, paid for private lactation consultants, and it still didn't work out, so my advice to you would be:

1. Make sure that you are aware of the postnatal support available - groups, clinics, consultants etc.
2. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work - don't beat yourself up and don't let it be the overriding thing of your first weeks with your baby. There are lots of people like Future who pop up to unhelpfully claim that almost everyone should be able to do it, and it can really make you panic if it isn't going right. Remember it's a learning curve for both of you, and don't let anyone pressure you as we put enough pressure on ourselves as it is.

Remember that it isn't easy to begin with.

This was my biggest mistake. Everything I read just said how it's best for baby and the most natural thing in the world - all of which is true. My son looks glorious. He is content and growing beautifully. However, I have found it so difficult some days and I wish I'd prepared myself for that more. Instead, I've felt guilty for not enjoying it when everyone said it would be so easy.

Be kind to yourself. Accept that some days you'll do nothing but feed. Don't feel guilty about wanting sleep/10 minutes without a baby attached to you.

Read up on:

• fourth trimester

• breastfeeding lying down

• safe co-sleeping

Read BF specialists Facebook pages and websites rather than just the info on generic parenting websites (e.g. Read Kellymom, The Milk Meg etc rather than Babycentre for example)

Know where to access help and support (websites above, nct, la Leche league) and seek support if you need it, especially in the early days.

Good luck!

Amongst other things mentioned by other posters here, the most helpful things for me where knowing the flipple technique (a way to get optimal amount of breast into baby's mouth) and knowing what a good latch looks like. I saw some of Dr Jack Newman's videos and they were really helpful.
I would suggest going along to a La Leche League meeting before you have the baby and ask for their top tips, you'll get some really honest and useful answers and the groups can be a great support.
Good luck

Even if it's going as well as it possibly can do, it can be pretty relentless at first.

Like many things about looking after babies, I found it really helpful to think of myself and the baby as animals, rather than humans (yes, I know humans are animals.....). That way, I could deal with any paranoid middle of the night thoughts about the baby being "out to get me". They weren't, they were just being a baby animal following its instincts. And animals just curl up and feed and sleep when their babies are new, they have no urge to get up and do housework or do anything except feed themselves and their babies.......Civilization has got a lot to answer for........

The thing I found most helpful to understand is that every mother/baby pair is a unique dyad. The frequency of feeds, the hold that works best, the challenges, etc - they are all going to be specific to you and your baby.

Obviously there are themes, and good / bad advice, and things that work for lots of people, it's not as if you have to invent bf on your own But just because something works for someone else doesn't mean it will work for you, so remember to be kind to yourself and trust yourself.

Remember too that it's possible to establish bf successfully from a mixed feeding start if you need to eg a difficult labour or a pph can delay your milk coming in. I have several friends who have done this including one who had a baby in SCBU.

It's easy to be blasé about it and to trust your body but I've found breast feeding very hard.

The prenatal classes I went to gave me invaluable advice regarding cluster feeding and growth spurts but they should put WAY more emaphasis on this I think!

Lanisoh cream was a god send

Expressing colostrum a couple of weeks before I was due and up to when she was born helped me familierise myself with my breasts and also meant my DD could be fed my colostrum as she was taken away from me for 3 hours due to an infection.

Midwives will teach you 100 different positions for feeding. Most of which use 36 pillows and cushions. I wish from the beginning they had just shown me lying down, laid back and across my front. They are the practical ones in my opinion.

It does hurt at first...the nipples do toughen up.

A good latch isn't always natural as babies have to learn alongside you and neither of you really know what you're doing ❤️

Support groups are life saving!

7.5 weeks now and I feel I'm finally getting the hang of it 😂

Feeding while lying down saved me, along with my iPad and a few Netflix box sets.

Some really good official advice above. I'd like to share my personal tips...
Agree with iPad - download box sets/ games etc. Some babies feed often and for a long time!
Some tracking apps will help if you want to stick to a schedule. I found it helped baby to sleep well.
I bought something called a koalakin (from us) so I could be hands free. Some people can use a ring sling. This meant I could walk around/ get a drink/ snack or eat dinner!!
My DH set up some tea and biscuits dying long cluster feeds.
Get your baby used to a bottle early on, if you don't want formula, then pump some BM so DH can feed. I didn't and when I wanted to stop I couldn't as baby refused bottle. (This is MY view)
Go to local children centre for free breast feeding support group (mine was called bosom buddies)
If it hurts too much to feed, check for tongue tie. No medics noticed it in my ds and I checked him myself. Got it snipped. Very quick and then feeding was dramatically easier.
Wear layered clothing for feeding. Don't bother with covers etc, you'll show less if you can pull top layer up and bottom layer down. I bought straps tops from primark in larger size for the bottom layer. Wear a loose top on top. Nursing tops just look crap and frumpy.
Don't be discouraged if you get mastitis or blisters. Keep feeding and suckling is the quickest way to sort it.
Don't envy people bottle feeding (I did) as they seem to have more freedom. Breast feeding is so much less hassle and cheaper too. You never need to pack anything and basically can comfort your baby any time, anywhere.
Good luck!

Thank you so much to you all for taking the time to reply! I've read every single comment and have made a few notes :) I'm definitely going to try and find out what support will be available to me and will try everything that has been suggested! Xxx

My only advice would be to ignore all the advice. Don't get me wrong it's useful to have some idea what to expect but absolutely everyone and every baby is different.

And I can absolutely guarantee that every single new mother will feel like she doesn't know how to do it to start with.

It hurts (sometimes), it's relentless, you'll worry that they're not getting enough / are hungry. You'll put pressure on yourself and in some cases, despite doing absolutely everything, it doesn't work out. Just bear all that in mind if you struggle with it.

I agree with the pp about seeing how it goes for you and baby. It can be hard but it can also just work, and you don't know which type you're going to get!

Teaandbiscuits has it right. I read up loads on BF and was kind of dreading it after all the horror stories of cluster feeding, bleeding nipples, bottle refusers etc. And do you know what? I was one of the lucky ones and it was easy. Tender nipples for a couple of weeks, whacked on the lanolin cream, and that was all. 4 months in and no long feeding sessions (an hour max), no mastitis, no thrush, no blocked ducts, baby happy to take a bottle of ebm when I go out, and just started sleeping through. It can happen. Be prepared for the worst but hope for the best!

I have remembered the other most useful piece of bf advice I was given:

The only way to know if they are getting enough milk is their weight gain and an age-appropriate frequency of wet/dirty nappies (the expected frequency changes with age). Their behaviour, how your boobs feel, how often they feed, the way they feed, etc etc are all inconclusive indicators of having enough milk.

I doubted myself a lot on this point and I was reasonably relaxed about bf and surrounded by lots of support. It's easy to doubt when you're sleep deprived and there is no easy way to tell what's going on with your baby.

If you fancy reading a book I can recommend the food of love by Kate Evans (I think!). I found it so useful.