Feel sad and guilty about stopping breastfeeding

[blondieblonde]

My little one is 2 and 1/3 and has been a regular breastfeeder all that time. Though I have loved, and still do love feeding her I'm very run down and feel I ought wean her to try and get some strength back (she's my second).

Unlike my first she's always been intensely attached to her milk. I tried to wean her before and she became miserable and lost weight. For the past two days I've gone cold turkey and she has been a bit unhappy but more fussing than devastated. However tonight she seemed genuinely heartbroken she couldn't have her usual bedtime milk. I am excited about getting my body back to myself and trying to get my health back on track, but also felt sad as she cried that it was the end and that she could see she was growing up. I reassured her that although the milk was going mummy would always be here, but was v. emotional. Am I depriving her of a loving thing and also some immune protection just as winter rolls around again? Should I press on with weaning now I've started?

Feeling bad.

You've done a wonderful job, and I think you're doing a fine job of stopping now.

I stopped at the same point with my son (because I was pregnant and feeding I'm felt like torture - that pregnancy ended at 12 weeks and I felt bad that I stopped for 'nothing'), and it was the right thing to do. We stopped fairly abruptly, and swapped his dad in to sort out bedtime for a few days. He got warm milk in a cup at bedtime, and seemed fairly content with that (he's only it's stopped wanting that a year and a half later).

I'm sure that by now, your daughter has an excellent immune system - and she won't remember this, or be emotionally scarred by it. I promise. You can have lovely cuddles and read stories at bedtime, and you can get your own body back (joy!) and not fall into resenting and really not enjoying feeding (by the end, I pretty much hated it - I'm sad about that).

You might feel a bit sad and emotional, because of the hormone changes when you stop as well as the feelings you have. Be kind to yourself - you're doing something that sounds like the right thing at this point for you both.

I think you've done amazingly well and I can only hope to aspire to feed for that long. I cav understand your guilt but you don't actually have anything to feel guilty for. Just feel proud and help your daughter get through this tiny bump in the road

One thing that helped was cutting the length of feeds - as I stopped saying Mummy is running out of milk, let's cuddle while I make some more. Saying later rather than no seemed to go down better and it made the transition from feeding to cuddling happen quite gradually (about 2y5m so a similar stage). There are books for children about stopping breastfeeding that you may find it helpful to read together.

Ahh I feel I will be in the same position soon
My son is 2 and I just feel like I need to get my body and strength back!
Hormones still raging meaning pelvic pain has never gone since pregnancy and he still wakes up every two hours at night for a feed
I also feel that a Recent miscarriage is due to the fact I'm just so weak and underweight from the constant feeding, my son is thriving all whilst I am wasting away!
So I know it would be the right thing but I'm emotional about it already and haven't even started!
You've fed for so long and that's so amazing! If you feel the time is right... it is
No advice but wishing you luck! X

I'm just starting trying to stop bf my 14 month dd. It just feels so uncomfortable now, I don't know why. To avoid the grumpyness I have been offering her some "special milk" in her cup at the times she would've been breastfeeding- it's the formula she had when she was tiny and I had to mix feed for a while. She loves it and drinks much more than cows milk. Then wants a cuddle but isn't so bothered about a feed. Might be worth a try?

Please dont get me wrong, i fully support BF but I honestly think that at the age of 2 your toddler is perfectly fine without BF. The immunity she got from you was during her first year when BF was the only thing she could have.
It is definitely just psychological attachment by now, and probably more so for you i think. Everything comes and goes quickly with toddlers and she will absolutely fine in no time.
There is absolutely nothing to be guilty or sad about, quite the opposite. You BF for much longer than the majority of us and it really is the time to let go and take care of yourself.

Thanks mums, I appreciate it x