Dummy refuser

[SquedgieBeckenheim]

DD2 is 5 months old and point blank refuses to have a dummy. In the early weeks I started letting her suck on my finger (as a temporary measure) to settle her before she got the hang of thumb sucking or agreed to take a dummy. We've tried all brands of dummy's and spent a fortune but she spits them all out/pushes it away/turns her head. She will chew/suck her fingers but when trying to sleep only my finger is good enough apparently. If I'm trying to settle her by patting or stroking her she'll grab my hand and bring it to her mouth.
My question is, what is the best way to break this habit? I wouldn't mind, but she's going for surgery in a month or so, and I won't be able to stay with her in PICU so she'll need another way to settle! I'd rather sort this before she goes in.

Never been in the situation of a child having an op but I'd say everything will be so different a routine won't make much difference. I am however shocked that you won't be able to stay with DD? I assume you aren't breastfeeding but what if you were?

Also maybe she just doesn't want a dummy.

She is breastfed, and I'll be with her on the ward. The few days on PICU (paediatric intensive care unit) she'll be tube fed and there isn't space for me to stay overnight. Once she's well enough to go back on the ward I'll be with her 24 hours again.

Will she be sedated so won't need you to settle? Mine was a finger sucker but found her own thumb before that age.

I had one of these! I think it might be something to do with them being exclusively breastfed; you didn't say, but if like me you are unable to express and so she is only used to your breast I am afraid I have no suggestions. I was her food and her dummy, she would only sleep on me and getting her into her own bed was a nightmare. Sorry, I know this isn't what you want to hear especially with her operation looming, but hopefully gives you reassurance that you're not alone. I've not known a single friend have the same type of baby as this & feel unique in my (knackering) experience.

I think as other posters have said, the sedation and complete change of routine when she has her op will make her sleepy anyway. As for the future, hang in there, it passes. And just think of the good things; no mishapen dummy-teeth, or crooked thumb-sucker teeth. Or dummy weaning. My second child is a dummy user and I'm not looking forward to those things!

Hope the op goes well x

She won't be sedated the whole time she's on PICU. I expected her to find her own fingers long ago! Health Visitor reckons it's because she knows if she's sucking on my finger I can't leave her this isn't her first operation, last time she was much younger and we were still trying dummies

woke she isn't exclusively breastfed, but her formula is through a tube and only 2 feeds in 24 hours. I am her sole point of comfort though, no one else is good enough when she's tired! She's asleep on me as I type... If she weren't going back into hospital I wouldn't be worried about it yet. It's just yet another source of anxiety for me, worrying about her getting upset in hospital when I'm not there.
DD1 was a dummy user, a year after weaning off of it she still talks about her dummy fondly.

Is it just you? What happens if you leave her with someone else?

Um, not left her with anyone else since she was last in hospital

Don't be embarrassed about that! Nobody says you have to. Partner about? They ever have her? Would she accept anyone else? Shifts sitting by her bed at the hospital?

Husband is around, she will happily be with him till she gets tired or hungry, then she wants me. She used to settle to sleep with him, but suddenly started refusing that a month or so ago. When she's awake and happy she'll go to anyone!

What happens if you leave them to it or go out for a bit?

My breastfed babies wouldn't go near a dummy, I can't imagine they are as comforting as a nice warm nipple! I hope something helps