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Original poster

DH has lost the use of an arm after a hit and run motorbike accident - we're having a baby!!

20 replies

Hopeitwontbebig · 27/03/2007 13:00

We already have two children, age 10 and 7. We're expecting number 3 in September. My DH was a VERY hands on Dad from day 1, he was brilliant with nappies and feeding etc and really enjoying being involved.

He suffered a Brachial Plexus Injury which resulted in him losing the use of his right (lead) arm. I've been looking on line to try and find 'gadgets' to help him with the baby etc but am finding it quite difficult to find anything.

Is there anything for helping pick a baby up one handed, feeding, changing etc

OP posts:
Miaou · 27/03/2007 13:03

Congratulations Hope!

No experience in this area, but are you still in touch with physiotherapists etc? I would think they would be a good place to start as they may know what is available and would particularly suit your dh's needs.

glassslipper · 27/03/2007 13:04

hopeitwontbebig. can he use his elbow? or is the whole arm? and is it right or left arm?

i know of someone who broke her wrist a couple of days after having a baby. after about 2 weeks she was able to pick the baby up and change nappies using left hand and right elbow.

glassslipper · 27/03/2007 13:05

sorry. i see it is his right arm.

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raspberryberet · 27/03/2007 13:05

Speak to the physios, or ask to be referred to an occupational therapist - they might be able to recommend some tricks your dh can try, or some aids to help him.

skirmish · 27/03/2007 13:06

find yourself a good occupational therapist...they can advise on all sorts of gadgets

skirmish · 27/03/2007 13:06

x post with raspberry

Original poster
Hopeitwontbebig · 27/03/2007 15:48

It's his entire arm right up to the shoulder. Will get in touch with an occupational therapist. Thanks

OP posts:
Judy1234 · 27/03/2007 16:21

People can learn to reuse the left arm and hand as if it were the right, learn to right with the left etc so it's possible. Was it Alison Lappard who had a baby and she has no arms or legs? ANyway not easy. Would you get some free local authority immediate care after the birth in the circumstances?

Quite a few things you can do with one hand I think with babies anyway remembering all those years when I had baby on breast with one arm and using other arms to deal with sundry other children.

He has made a claim to the Criminal Injuries Compensation Scheme?

PeachyClair · 27/03/2007 16:26

I've seen poeple cope exceptionally well with one arm, its a learned thing really.

If you re worried though, would a homestart volunteer (look on their website) help whilst he was learning? We had someone with a smilar (albeit neurological) problem when I was working for them, just to give them a chnace to adapt.

Hillary · 27/03/2007 16:30

My mum has very bad R.Arthritis she has new hips, fused ankle, new knees, her hands cannot straighten, her elbow on one arm is fused and her wrist doesnt straighten out at all, now her spine is going too.

Through all this she raised 3 children on her own!

It can be done

Congratulations, where theres a will theres a way

Original poster
Hopeitwontbebig · 27/03/2007 16:54

Peachy, my DH's injury is also neurological, basically the nerves that control his arm were ripped from his spinal cord

Xenia, we've got a solicitor who is on the case for us. It'll be years before it reaches its conclusion though. The accident only happened in November.

He's doing really well so far, even does his shoe laces up with one hand.... I can't even do that with my right hand let alone my left!! He's a true superstar. He's also very proud and likes to get on and do things his own way, so he wouldn't really want someone from Homestart, although I think it's a brilliant charity!!

Really need gadgets or something....

OP posts:
PeachyClair · 27/03/2007 16:58

Pride is a goof thing in these sitautions- helps epople to cope loads. And gives them a reserve to pull on to make them learn.

I bet he'll be fine.

PeachyClair · 27/03/2007 17:02

Isn't there some thing- did I see Alsion lapper or someone- with like a sling that she rolled under baby, then could pick up with her mouth, although obv your DH can just use remianing hand? Almost like a piece of large terry towelling?

OT is definitely the way to go, I think,

Actually picking up a baby omne handed isn't hard, (fors ome bizarre reason I always did that? ) you sort of come in from the other side and scipoop up and under lifting head and body in a line- I bet trhat was when I had DS1 and ds2 tiny together LOL! changing- hmm, lay baby down, strip, open nappy, place under, lift 2 legs up an don, secure. When theyre little it should be OK< toddlers a bit harder.

bathing- we have a bath support in the bath we're not using- kinda a chaitr that holds them safe. Do you want it to use? It has a between the legs bit that stops them slipping down. Alternatively I bought it from blloming marvellous (although Boots ahve them sometimes)

Original poster
Hopeitwontbebig · 27/03/2007 17:05

That is SO nice of you to offer Peachy! But I've been offered some bits my friends who've recently had babies... thank you though! x x

OP posts:
Original poster
Hopeitwontbebig · 27/03/2007 17:06

Also, that's a great idea re picking up baby.

OP posts:
PeachyClair · 27/03/2007 17:10

No probs. Its just one of those bizarre things I always did (apaprenlty i have weak wrists? maybe thats why I do it)

onlytheone · 28/03/2007 23:13

My DH is disabled through chemotherapy which has caused a neurological problem which has affected his legs mainly. Arms are weak and he cannot lift our 3 year old (or heavy shopping!). We found the occupational health team very helpful through the District Nurses. Worth a chat to see what is available.

Original poster
Hopeitwontbebig · 29/03/2007 10:09

Thanks onlytheone x

OP posts:
jennyroper · 30/09/2008 13:41

hello hopeitwontbebig
i have only just seen your thread. I have a brachial plexus injury to my right arm too - motorbike accident 8 years ago which has left my arm paralysed up to the shoulder. I have a 2 year old son and am pregnant with twins. Should be interesting when they come along!
I assume you will have both managed brilliantly as you will have had your third baby by now but I just wanted to say hello.
Did your husband manage ok at the beginning? I didn't really use anything particularly different to anyone else and managed to look after my son fine on my own. I must say I'm slightly daunted at the prospect of grappling with 3 children under 3 with one arm but I'm sure it'll be fine (ha ha ha!)
As it's such a recent injury I remember it's an awful lot harder in the beginning with pain and not being used to it. It really does become so much easier it's astonishing how your brain can deal with it. Having my son was better than any physio I've very had on it too. I have got quite a bit more muscle and use from my hand now than I've ever had.
I wish your husband all the best though it can be pretty damned frustrating.

LoveMyGirls · 30/09/2008 13:50

Respect to you JR!

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