How to curb this behaviour from DS?

[snoopypoodle]

DS (2) is generally a lovely affectionate boy, likes to learn new things etc.

The only issues with his behaviour is his not headedness if you can call it that.
I'm not trying to be strict or anything like that and I understand he's just 2 and is learning I'm just looking for tips to diffuse and handle the situations better.

Examples

• playgroup, DS was playing with little ball and it rolled towards a boy who picked it up and wanted to have it for himself, DS took it/snatched it back but the boy didn't do anything just went back to playing with other toys, then the ball rolled over to another boy who picked it up and was actually going to pass it back to DS but without paying attention just in a possessive "don't take my ball" kind of way he ran up to the boy and swatted him on the head and took his ball back. Boy was crying and DS just ran off.

• he got frustrated as he couldn't piece his blocks together and moaned/cried, I said "do you want mommy to show you?" and he got a little frantic and swatted at me

• he generally swats at people when he doesn't want their involvement, he doesn't like sharing

• sometimes he gets worked up/ frustrated, starts crying and shout/screaming without listening properly and won't listen once his in a state

it's mostly the hitting/swatting and not wanting to share.
I know it will get better but I have already seen lots of kids younger than him being better at sharing and understanding taking turns etc.

Any tips?

I think you need to stop this behaviour before it turns into a bigger problem. At 2 years old it's understandable that this is happening and as an only child ( I'm assuming ) this behaviour will be even more prevalent.

There are a few steps I would recommend. Firstly, I would make sharing a positive experience. Next time you play with him possibly with the blocks go to help. If he gets frantic and swats at you and gets in a state you simply remove the blocks altogether. Let him know that if he can't share he loses the item. If he swats at another child in the playground with a ball then remove the ball from his possession and give it to the other child. It's all about learning the connection between this behaviour and a negative outcome. It may put you in difficult positions but, it will avoid many other situations in the future in which physical contact from him may force the other child to react physically also.

When he actively shares with you reward him with a overly positive reaction. It's the only way children in daycare learn.

I agree

You need to model sharing at home - share food toys bath - talk about taking turns and being kind

Strips results in removal - and ignore the tantrum it get him nowhere

Thank you for the replies.

He does share sometimes, sometimes it's about the way I approach him. He sometimes offers me to share his food/toys out of his own initiative but he is more reserved around other children.

I generally remove him/take toy away and give it to other child if he wanted to take it from another child or if there's lots and he won't let the child have any, but should I also do it when it's something he has been playing with in the first place and another child takes it or snatches it?
I do explain to him if he upsets other kids (it had only happened 2 times in the past 6-7months so it's not too bad bad I suppose) which sometimes takes a minute but then sinks in and he just clings onto me and looks sulky for a while, not sure if that's the right way to be.

One more point I forgot to mention.
When he's excited he sometimes runs around like crazy with no attention to his surroundings, he started bounce/running and fell over a little girl a few weeks ago and didn't seem to take any notice and just ran off. I did get him and explain and showed him the little girl was crying etc, her mum said she's used to it as she often gets accidentally mauled by her big DD but I still felt like a terrible mum.

I know the feeling this is a difficult situation.

I would say that when another child comes over to him and tries to take a toy away you should be on hand to ensure that your son gets to keep the toy. There is a fine line between sharing and enabling him to be a push over.

So if another child actively goes to take a toy away from her son you don't let this happen.

However, if a child comes over in a friendly manner or the toy rolls to them accidentally you remove the toy if your son swats at them.

It's one of those difficult situations where you will have to monitor your childs behaviour and watch for any signs of aggression and then remove the toy as appropriate.

and don't feel like a terrible mum for him accidentally hurting another child!

He didn't do it on purpose and you couldn't have expected to stop it.

You did the right thing explaining to him that sometimes accidents can make other people sad and the effect of consequences etc so don't worry about that. You're doing great