Almost 6 year old playing baby

[VagueyMcVague]

Some opinions please. My DD will be 6 in a few weeks. She's an August baby and therefore almost the youngest in her year, she's also very petite, sucks her thumb and is young-minded in herself. She often wants to act like a baby, have me carry her around, sometimes speaks baby babble, gets me to pretend she's in my tummy and dicks around in the mornings so I end up getting her dressed so we can get out of the door. My eldest was always more self-contained and at 6 was getting herself dressed, tidying her room, clipping herself into her car seat; all things which my youngest refuses to do. We won't be having any more children and if I' m honest I do enjoy treating her like a baby a bit as she'll be my last.

Anyway, she's come home from school upset a few times saying that people call her baby. She's a little bugger as she does solicit this when it suits her (she gets the Year 6 girls at school to pick her up ) and I had a stern word with myself that I wasn't helping and should stop this 'baby game'. I told her this yesterday and she absolutely broke her heart, genuine deep sobs. Cue me feeling guilty. She said this morning that she's worried about not being clever enough for Year 2 SATS next year She will though

On the one hand I think if that's what she wants to do I should just go with it; if that's what she wants to explore as she develops so be it. On the other hand, I wonder if I'm holding her back and should discourage it kindly.

Would appreciate any advice or perspectives.

I'm personally against babying. But that's me in my life! I want the kids to do stuff for themselves.

I bet she knows how to get her own way at home and that's what she does. Do you want to pander to that?

I think in the nicest possible way you are holding her back, babying her won't do her any favours and can be detrimental to her development.

She likes being babied but you admit you facilitate this by carrying her around, getting her dressed, clipping her into the car etc these are all things children her age should be able to do for themselves.

I think you're going to have to go down the tough love route and nip the babying in the bud cold turkey, it will benefit you both in the long run

I have a 6 1/2 yr old dd who also likes to pretend she's a baby. The situation is different in that she's the oldest in her class by several months - she will turn 7 thus Autumn, the others will start turning 7 in Spring ( we delayed her starting school by a yr. In Ireland where parents choose when children start school)

I go along with her games for the most part unless I feel she's pretending to be a baby to manipulate. She loves playing with dolls too and to me these are all just games. I don't let her away with not doing stuff though- we always have a target of what we want her to learn. She's just got the gang if her seat belt, next target is putting on socks. She finds stuff hard to do (fine motor problems) so will happily sit back and let you do anything for her do we have to be mindful of not letting this happen. On school mornings, I dress her from head to toe because she can't do shirt buttons, tights etc.

I'm probably the wrong person to give advice though because she had her dummy til nearly 5 and still ends up in our bed every night. I feel they'll stop looking for comfort when they dont need it any more. My son is a healthy stroppy 16 year old who grew out of things in his own time.

Hmm. I have a similar age DD, also the youngest. She likes a good baby game - hold me like a baby, sing to me, lots of questions about what she was like as a baby, sometimes baby talk, likes playing with toy babies etc.

But: she dresses herself, does car seat, shoes on, brushes her hair & teeth & washes face, clears the table, puts her clean clothes away, pours her own drink. So as she is independent and capable, sometimes I indulge the baby "game" because it's just role play, and it doesn't spill into "real life" - there are clear boundaries of what is part of the game, and what are everyday expectations. No "baby game" is played when life needs to go on e.g. School mornings.

So I'd try to insist and encourage grown up behaviour but still play the game on occasion, but being clear it is a game I.e. No different to pretending to be Snow White for half an hour or whatever.

Having said this, my DD sobbed when I called the cat my fur baby, and I had to cuddle & reassure she'd always be my baby no matter how big. Growing up can be scary for some kids, they worry they won't have your love in the same way, so lots of reassurance and positive praise when she dresses herself etc. Your DD sounds sensitive if she's worrying about SATS so gentle reassurance and building her confidence.

Does she cope with getting changed for PE?

Does she make other adults like her dad, friends mums, grandparents etc join in the baby game? Doesn't it irritate her older sibling?

I think it's fine to make time and play the baby game (even the toughest person enjoys being patented when ill) and some of it is normal. My older kids dick about when we need to rush.

Thanks so much for all your replies. They make perfect sense but it's wierd how you can't see the wood for the trees when you're in a situation.

You're right she knows exactly how to get what she wants but is also a very sensitive, sometimes anxious soul. NCendoflifedilemma I think that's what I need to do; make it clear that there are times when we can and can't play the baby game. And otherwise slowly phase it out. This makes me sad but luckily I have wine!

Eyebrowsonfleek on PE days they just wear kit to school all day and yes her older sister gets annoyed by it. It's a good point I do need to think about her needs more.

Thanks again to you all

I neee you guys help!!!!
My 6 yr old nearly 7 all of a sudden will not go to bed she has always been amazing my other half went on holiday 5 weeks ago for a week she was unsettled which ia understandable but shes been the same ever since screams or just does not listen for a good four 5 hours after bedtime. The school has no clue. And waiting on community pediatric to get in vontact as i have ms and am becoming so stressed and tired. I dno what to do lol. She will sleep if someone lays with her but then wakes again few hours later its like a seperatiom issue but i jist dno. Any ideas help would be greatly appreciated x