Toddler Naps & Sleep

[Sleepthief84]

Sorry, this is long!

I was wondering when your toddlers went from two naps to one, and if my DD maybe sleeps too much? She is 15.5 months and thought I've never been strict on routine, she is! I'm a SAHM with only the one child so I'm able to accommodate her, but it can be a little restrictive. When she was small I was very baby led, never sleep trained. She never napped more than 20 mins as a newborn then 4-10 months she napped 2/4 times a day only on me, upright due to silent reflux and the fact that I had to dreamfeed her every bottle. Her routine is as follows, this varies by half hour each way. She'll only sleep in her cot, and happily goes down awake every time. She 'asks' to go to bed when she's tired by bringing me her sleeping bag and waving 'bye' at her toys. She generally sleeps through at night. If she misses her nap, she's a nightmare. If she has it she's generally a very happy girl. Her weight is spot on, always has followed the 75th centile from birth and development/milestones are normal. She stopped having any milk except in cooking/cereal at 13 months.

6:30am Awake & breakfast
8:15am- 10:15am Nap
11am Lunch, followed by snacks (fruit etc) before next nap
1pm - 3pm Nap
4pm Dinner
5:30pm Snack (generally natural yoghurt/weetabix)
6pm Bed

I was just wondering if this is typical? Everyone I speak to with kids around the same age seems to think she sleeps excessively (MIL) and that I let her go to bed too early and also (friends) are pretty not understanding when I decline to meet up at naptime because I don't see the point of bringing a child out who is just going to cry the whole time because she's tired.

Ok so she's happy when she's had her naps and miserable when she hasn't? And generally sleeps all night?

Then bugger what anyone else thinks frankly! Or is there a reason you want to change?

(Ps can't remember when DD went to 1 nap, it's all been forgotten and she's only 3!)

No, I'm fairly happy with how we are. Like I said it can be a bit restrictive as in I can't just go where i want when I want but I guess in my mind my job now is being a mum, and that means catering to my daughter's needs first and foremost rather that my social life. I just go out when she's awake.l and get home roughly for naptime. My friends mostly have older kids and the two close ones (who comment) were very out and about people who insist that their kids didn't really need to nap past tiny baby age. They suggest quite a lot that I 'pander' to her. If we have a family day out for example she will doze off in her buggy or car seat at a push but not without a total meltdown first and only for half hour or so. She settles fine if we (for example) go out and stay overnight with family too, she just goes down as normal in her travel cot.

My DS slept a little bit less and went down to one nap at 12 months, but your routine doesn't look that unusual to me at all. From 7-12 months he took 2 x 1.5 hour naps at approx 9 and 1 every day. It was annoying that he swopped to one nap so early because a lot of his pals from baby group were still on 2 and basically at the exact opposite time.

He just turned 2 and sleeps approx 11-12 hours per night and usually naps for 2 hours during the day. I have friends with similar aged toddlers that nap for 3-4 hours every day and still sleep v well at night. Some kids just need a lot of sleep! It is annoying when you can't do stuff because of it, but I love naptime chilling at home. I get so much done in the house and get a break so it works for me the majority of the time.

My DS has dropped his morning nap at 12 months, goes to bed at 8 and wakes through the night. Your situation sounds like a dream! Embrace the free time while she naps and ignore what everyone else says as long as your both happy

My daughter dropped naps herself when she was ready, I just followed her lead.

If she's happy and sleeping well then I'd stick with it!

I would say would say she sleeps a little more than average but not excessively so.
If you are both happy and she's healthy then it's definitely not worth messing up her schedule and having a constantly cranky baby just to appease others.

IMO they're just jealous that their kids aren't as good sleepers

I remember when my life was dictated by naps!!

Between the ages of 9 months up until he was about 2 years old he had two naps a day, both 90 minutes long and were from 09.30-11.00 and then 14.30 until 4pm. It pretty much meant I couldn't leave the house but there was no way I was disturbing his sleep routines and I'm pretty sure people thought I was crazy!!

When he was about 2 years old he then switched to having just one nap after lunch where he slept from 1pm-3.30pm.

He carried on with his one long afternoon nap until he was about 3 years and 2 months.

He's now 3 years and 4 months and maybe two days a week he will still have a long nap after his lunch.

It sounds like you've got a great routine going so stick with it

Thanks all! I feel a bit more reassured now anyway. I do enjoy naptime I must admit, morning nap is housework and shower time for me but afternoon nap I do tend to have a bit of a chill out. You'd think after a year and a half of this mothering lark I'd have figured out that generally just following baby's lead and not listening to other peoples criticisms works, wouldn't you?! Maybe I just get a bit lonely when I don't see people for a few days. I need some new friends who won't mind coming to me for a bit 😂 OH does 14 hour days including his commute so I'm on my own quite a bit.

Lizibet you may have a point actually. One of my friends has 3 kids under 6. The 6 year old is fine but the younger two both wake frequently in the night from 11pm and are up at 5 most mornings. The other one has 2 good sleepers. Im never smug about DD sleeping well though, I know only too well how hard it is being sleep deprived. The first few months of DDs life she barely napped and woke frequently at night then even when she started sleeping at night I had to set a bloody alarm and get up twice in the night to dreamfeed her milk she wouldn't have otherwise have woken for because she was on medication that meant she could only go 4 hours without a feed. It was rough. Plus as I said in the OP I spent months sat on the sofa in the day with a sleeping baby on me for hours as it was the only way she'd nap and I could get her milk in her. So I am always conscious not to be an arse about getting a good nights sleep now when I'm talking to people.

If you find it restrictive and lonely then I would be encouraging naps on the go in car/buggy a couple of times a week. You may find she gets used to it and it will give you a bit more freedom.

That is a lot of sleep but if it works for her and she needs/wants it then great.

My 14mo mostly has 1 2hr ish nap at about 11am and then sleeps 6.30-5/5.30 ish. However this is flexible and she can have 2 naps or catch naps in the car buggy if needed and I'll adjust her bedtime accordingly. She had to be as I also have a 3yo.

Sounds great - don't worry about what other people are doing, the other mums with older kids have clearly forgotten about the 2 nap stage. Which can go on for AGES. I am in the middle of it with DC2, who naps 9.00-10.30 and 1.30-3pm. So basically I have a 3 hour window to get out and about in the morning or in the afternoon. She goes to bed at 7 and sleeps through. I also have an older DC who is out at preschool mornings and has quiet time in the afternoon too. It all hangs together ok but as you say it feels quite restrictive!

Babies can transition to one long nap any time from 12-18 months but there's no hard and fast rule, and the biggest giveaway for me that we needed to move to one nap was when DC1 started waking at night for chats (clearly too much daytime sleep)! As pp said you can always bridge the transition by making the morning nap a flexible option - perhaps buggy/car seat and then home for the longer afternoon nap.

In the meantime, enjoy the downtime - it does pass and then you have to actually do things to entertain them 😱.

I think it sounds awesome!

My baby of the same age

6am awake (if I'm lucky- otherwise 515 onwards
10am nap
1130-12 lunch
If first nap was less than 45 minutes
3-330 second nap
6pm bath
630 bed