Childcare

[Laura1206]

Hello all!

I have an 8 month old LB and I return to work in November. I realise I have a while yet. I am going back three days, mon-weds.

For childcare it was going to be my parents, my in-laws and my sister each having him a day. My mum has since let us down as she works and buggers off to her caravan so we couldn't rely on her (long story but she's not very involved and we aren't close to each other).

So, my sister is having him a Monday, I've found a wonderful childminder to have him a Tuesday and the in-laws will have him on a Wednesday. Does this seem ok? Or do you think it would be too much? I realise there isn't much continuity.

Also, my sister is currently going through IVF but is adamant she wants to look after him but I've said the moment she finds it too much to let us know as I don't want her to feel she has to look after him. We are very close and she loves him to pieces.

I wanted to find a childminder as I didn't like the nursery I took him round and have seen a few others in the area. The child minder lives across the road from us and seems really lovely and I instantly felt at ease when I went there. The only thing is she charged half of the fee from now til November which I totally understand but being on mat pay it's stretching our finances a bit but we will do it.

Sorry for such a long message, I am just very stressed about it all!

Thanks for reading

Honestly (as an ex childminder), I think 3 settings a week is too much and I'm surprised the cm has taken him on for just one day a week. I understand the desire for his grandparents and Aunty to spend time with him which is lovely, but I think you'd be better putting him in with the cm for at least two consecutive days each week (Tuesday/Wednesday to save faffing with bank hol Mondays?) and then your in laws and sister alternating the Monday's.

Thank you. I am thinking this too. My husband's reasoning is the money aspect as it'd be doubling what we pay. On the other hand, it would be more if I were to go back full-time!

Totally agree with rum, it's too much for a baby to deal with.

I'd say 3 days with the CM too. I've done all the childcare for DGS for the 9 years since he was born but I consider it my 'job' and have never let my DD down.
The CMs I meet are all lovely and worth every penny it costs to take care of the most important person in your world.

Thanks, everyone. I have spoken to my husband, he says it doesn't matter what he thinks as we'll just do what I want anyway. I think a good compromise is MIL and sister so alternate Mondays. I will continue to think about it. I appreciate all your advice.

It will be harder for him to settle with the childminder one day a week, but long term it should be fine.

If you were using three different childminders or a nanny, a childminder and a nursery it would be too much, but this is his family and presumably people he is already close to?

I would talk to the childminder about settling in. Maybe ask her where she takes her mindees and go along to the same playgroup so that your DS can see her, but is still with you. As you're paying from now till November I would also ask if you could start settling a good few weeks before you go back to work.

My DD is 1 and I went back to work when she was 7 months. She goes to my mum on a Monday and nursery on a Friday and she has settled well considering she only does one day a week. The only time she gets upset going to nursery is if we miss a week, due to illness or whatever, so basically being consistent is key but she is fine just 1 day a week.

Thanks, everyone. It turns out the childminder has no room on a Wednesday so the decision has been made really. If he starts to become unsettled I will put him in with her the mon & tues. I have a fair while to go before I go back so I'll make sure he has lots of settling in sessions with her. Thanks, again. You've been brilliant x