How do you deal with girls falling out?

[Trixiebelle16]

My dd is about to go into year one. She is painfully shy and trails round after her louder "friend" at playtime. Today one of the lunchtime supervisors told me that dd was on her own today and the friend and another girl were excluding her. I was so upset to hear this, I did gently mention it to the friend's mum. She was lovely, she said that it wasn't nice and she would have a word with her daughter. But then the two girls came out of the school gate chatting together so I don't know if I've just made things worse. Dd says nothing happened and she had a good day but I know she wouldn't tell me if it did. How involved am I supposed to get in these things. My head says to leave it alone but my heart is breaking to think of others being horrible to her and her being alone.

Hey. I'm the parent you had a word with. Except not in real life obviously.

Leave them to it. There's nothing the parent can do. We can't force friendships. We can teach our children to be polite and pleasant and nice but we shouldn't force them to form friendships that could ultimately end up unhealthy.

Maybe encourage your daughter to assert herself or make new friends??

I've tried to put myself in your shoes (in my own circumstances and it would be absolutely heartbreaking for any parent to see and hear these things x sorry you're going through this and hope you can find a solution.

I hope this has come across as i intended x

I'd try to encourage and expand on other friendships. There will be other dc in her class who she could join in with. Maybe her teacher will have some ideas of where your dd might find other relationships.

Also, I'd build her up a bit by finding something outside of school that she enjoys and that she can be with different dc outside of school.

Oh, it was a saga, up down up down. School moved DD to a different class eventually (best thing ever).

Thanks guys, it's hard to take a step back and not worry but I will try x

Im in your shoes. I have tried to make my dd more assertive and not be pushed around. She never gets to pick the games she wants to play, always her friend. My dd has started to play with other cjikdren and we encourage this. In fact since she had played with other children recently, her bossy friend has started to be much nicer to her. Im still hoping my dd will continue to be strong and not be pushed around.