Thinking of Abortion

[ShockedMyself]

Pregnant with 2nd child. Currently thinking I really do not want the responsibility of a second lo. Always disliked my first lo´s babyhood and so pleased she is older now. Also fed up of not having my own life at all as it is and I know things will get worse when the 2nd is born. Don´t know if I really could go through with an abortion or adoption. Does/Did anyone else feel like this and what did they do?

how old is your LO? i found it easier when my first child started nursery, maybe you will too?

How old is your first child?
All babies are different, so your DD's babyhood would not necessarily be the same as that of subsquent children.
Do you have any support from partner, friends and family ie: do you get a break from caring for your DD?

she´s about to start nursery. which will be nice for us both of course but it is only for a few hours..

How does your partner feel about your pregnancy?

DD1 was far from being a difficult baby but I hate the neediness and isolation. We are pretty much on own own together all the time.

its a few hours a day though,isnt it? (if shes around 3 i think?)

babyhood is a tough time,but its so short and i found (as have many others i believe) theyre second baby easier. did you have pnd last time,and maybe thats why it appeared so hard?

DP is really really pleased about the pregnancy.

so you have his support then,thats good.do you have a sure start or another similar organisation nearby?i too felt lonely and they helped me tons

May have had PND in retrospect but live abroad and never saw anything like a HV who might have spotted it. How do you distinguish between PND and just being the sort of person that does not enjoy babies for more than 2 minutes at a time?

I can understand that the prospect of no. 2 is overwhelming. I am really worrying about how I am going to cope when our second baby arrives in October, particularly as ds will be 20 months and is very, very active. Plus the effect it will have on my career/our finances...

The way I figure it, once you're through the first couple of years, at least your children have each other to play with so short-term pain for long-term gain, iyswim. I personally think that's easier than having to deal with an only child.

It might be helpful to go to your GP to see what help and support is available. Maybe take your DP with you too.

im not an expert or anything but to me pnd felt like something i had every single day,like a black cloud over everything? it can stop people enjoying things,including being a parent.it doesnt affect everyone the same,so you could have been different to me IYSWIM

That is a very personal decision....when i fell pregnant with my last two (twins) i thought of this for a second.....but i am a very 'baby' person..and i know i would have been forever wondering about the baby.....and i know would have regretted it....
i am not against abortion..for some people it's the right thing to do...you need to think hard....

having a second might be easier in the long run as your children would have each other....one would be more dependant on you....
all babies/toddlers are different...2nd time round is usually easier...

but only you know how you feel deep down..you need to discuss this with someone though...don't jump into anything before doing that.

xx

If you really only wanted to spend 2 minutes a day with your baby and you can't wait for her to go to nursery, maybe an abortion would be the best thing all round.

I think you just need time to adjust to the news.
I think the baby stage second time round is much better as you do have more of an idea. Also, with regard to the possiblity of PND you can be more aware of your symptoms and get the required help. Good Luck, don,t make any rash decisions. I'm sure it will be great in the end. Sometimes when you really dread things, they turn out to be great.