Tips on dealing with wailing four year old

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My DD is 4.5. I was struggling with behaviour a while back & read "how talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk". I found it super helpful & her behaviour is better but I am struggling to get her to stop wailing, screaming & generally flying off the handle when things aren't going her way. She knows "if we scream and cry we don't get what we want" but for example last week when out shopping she wanted me to take her into a specific shop to buy chocolate. When I said we weren't getting chocolates that day (we don't usually btw, in fact I have never taken her to this shop to buy chocolates!) she started screaming & crying and this continued all the way home. Obviously she didn't get any chocolates & I told her that I didn't like hearing all that screaming but does anyone have any tips of how to manage these episodes? I feel like four is too old to still be having big tantrums about things.

Warn her in advance (pre-empt a potential tantrum). On the way to the shops/park etc I tell my children that we are not buying sweets or magazines as I don't have the money that day/not going to the cafe so that they don't expect anything. Not sure if this will work but I always have this talk with mine and they never really ask or expect anything. If I am going to buy them something then they get told in advance but won't get it if they tantrum in the shop e.g. If they want a certain magazine but it's not on sale in that shop then they pick another but a tantrum about it means they get nothing. Don't know if this will work but could be worth a try????

Ps. My dc still have tantryns at four, especially when tired.

tantrums

I think the way you are handling it so far is spot on. You're not giving in to her hysterics and you definitely need to stay the course. At her age, I think you should begin giving preemptive warnings. If she acts out, then (whatever you decide) will happen. Don't give an inch because she will take a mile.