Do we Don't we go for three?????

[MelbourneMum]

I know the decision can only be ours but I"d love some opinions.

We have two delightful boys, 3 1/2 and 21 months. I am not desperate for a girl, I'd be delighted with either sex if we choose to have another child. We just cannot decide. There are many reasons why we feel we might just stop here as life seems managable (just about ) and we love to travel so its kind of 'one each' and we love our little family of four, yet we both really love the idea of another child too.

I had pnd with ds2 which does make me nervous and I found the jump from one to fairly life altering!

Any thoughts or experiences? I'm 34 so there's no huge rush but I wouldn't want to leave it too long

that should read 'the jump from one to two'

Think if you love the idea of another one go for it. I in same predicament and i have ds and dd. Sway both ways depending on what day i've had we just decided that i going to come of pill and see what happens.

am about to have our third on Friday and whilst we wonder how we will cope with three - we know that that is what we want. Have two dds and would love a third despite the no of times I have been asked if we are hoping for a boy. Our eldest is 4 1/2 and the next is 2y4m.

Our eldest also has sn - and for a while after a mad visit to Ikea one day - we wondered if trying for a third was madness - as you said it is kind of 'one each' - but by then it was too late I was already pregnant but it was very early days.

No regrets in the least. You said you are both keen - so why not?

Agree with you about the travel thing MM but I think it's only an issue when they are little. I've just had my 3rd and so far (she's 16 weeks) have found it fine. Much easier than going from 1 to 2. I also had PND with no.2 and no sign of it so far. My eldest is also SN eidsvold and my feeling is the more siblings he has the better his life will be, and ours

Melbourne, we have dd (8) and ds (17mth) but really, really want 2 more. I had sections both times so need to wait a bit before we go for 3 (said my GP). Hopefully we will go for it in the autumn. It's too expensive, we'll have to change cars, ds will have to share a room, we'll be knackered, fancy holidays will be a thing of the past, noone will babysit all 3 at once - but we are both so desperate to add more to our brood! (and dd is too, she'd like a sister apparently). Go for it!

I feel this decision is slipping away from me now as dd and ds get older. Life gets too easy and you just can't imagine going back to the baby route.
I say go for it while you're still used to the broken nights and the nappies. I wish I had.

Oh, Emat, you sound sad about it - don't regret not having another one - is it too late?

MM, do it!

You sound like you really, really want your 3rd baby.

I just knew, after two, that my family was complete. To have 3 was just not a consideration. All the cons outweighed the pros - in fact I don't think I even went that far. I just wanted a boy and a girl which I have, and with the ages they are now, life is so much easy and the thought of toddler groups, playing on the floor etc, makes me come out in hives!

There are others however who feel completely differently and the yearning for a baby is still very strong.

Fast forward, say 10 years, and imagine you had the 3 or that you'd stopped at 2. What would your feelings be? Just make sure you end up with no regrets.

I think if you add up pros and cons you would go with not having a third, but that yearning is so strong with us that common sense goes out the window!!!! Although my dh comes from 3 and my MIL said stop at 2. She is usually right but I like to think she is wrong this time! If I could I'd have 6, but then I'd have to home school (DH is thinking about the home school idea, I'm not so keen) but after 2 sections the most I can have is another 2 before my uterus would rupture completely! And after dd i said no more, strange how things change as you get older and less arsed about having a social life!

I am quite broody for number 3. DS1 is 2.6 and DS2 is 8 months, so to feel this way is plain madness, but I can't help it. DH says no, but could be persuaded I reckon. There are pros to waiting and having a bit of a gap, but the cons to that are what has been said here already (ie going back to the nappies etc) and also I might have gone back to work by then and would have to give it all up for a bit again.....I'd like that but we would get used to the money again etc etc....I just don't feel "done" yet you know?

I went out for dinner with 3 girlfriends last week, we all have 2 boys each of similar ages. A few bottles of wine in I said "Hands up if you think you will have another baby", and we all put our hands up! Obviously some will some won't, but this just made me think, do you ever feel really "done" with having babies when you know the true joy they bring outweighs the frigging hard work of it?

thanks so much everyone. So much food for thought.
When the two of them are shouting at each other at the breakfast table I think 'oh I'm so not having any more' and then ds2 toddles in in his babygro with the feet too long so he can hardly walk and says 'hi mama!' in his bright adorable little voice and puckers up for a kiss and I could just eat him he's so divine and I think 'Oh I want ten more of these'! Then ds1 throws a huge wobbly because I need to borrow his spoon and I think 'oh I just don't have the energy' and then five minutes later he says 'you're MY mummy and I want to hug you' and I think 'this is heaven'
I do this to-ing and fro-ing roughly 1000 times per day!

Go for it! Dh said to me yesterday how long do we have to wait before trying for the next one?!