Has anyone put baby in own room before 6 months

[akankwasakelly]

Our daughter is 14 weeks old, and sleeps in her cot next to my bed. It was a real big squeeze getting the cot in our room and because of this me and my other half have no room down the sides of our bed, so we have to crawl from the bottom to the top of the bed.. some of our slats are broken on the bed and it makes it really noisy, every time we get into bed it wakes the baby up, we also can't watch Tele in bed / talk because she seems to wake really easily.. she sleeps really well apart from us waking her up at night.
I know the nhs advise is 6 months but I'm thinking she might need to go in her own room earlier, has anyone else done this? I have a camera monitor so I can see her all night if I want too

4 months here and agree with wintertravel. The sids risk of not room sharing is circumstantial not causational as stated on lullaby trust info sheets.

winter
Thank you so much for sharing the research, it's not boring at all - I always want to know the facts behind the recommendations, and they can be hard to find! I've been really nervous about leaving DS alone when napping (anxious first time parent: guilty as charged!) so it's reassuring to know that's not one of the big factors. Also will feel more comfortable about leaving him to sleep in a separate room from 16 weeks if that's what we need/want to do.

I put both of mine (now aged 5 and 14) into their own rooms from about 4 weeks ish. I just couldn't relax or sleep properly with them next to me. I understand the sids risk but realised it was a small one weighed up against my own sanity (I had pnd with both). I did use very good baby monitors with both to make sure I could hear every sound (although I realise the sids link is about them regulating their breathing by hearing yours etc etc).

Both were sleeping through by about 8 weeks ish.

Make sure you read all the facts/research/guidelines and make your decision based on this.

Most of the people who have done this will have babies who are fine so asking who's done it and whether their baby was ok isn't really the best way to go about making your decision.

The risk may be tiny but the consequences are high.

I moved all 4 of my children into their own rooms between 11-16 weeks.

Personally my view is you can not stop cot death no matter what you do, if it's going to happen it will sadly (and I mean cot death not suffocation etc)

Sadly I know of 2 babies to die of cot death one was 6 weeks old and asleep in Moses next to mother and other was a month from 2nd birthday in own room.

If a baby dies from SIDS there is nothing you can do, they can not be resurrected, so things like angel care monitors are useless and all they would do would be to alert you it was happening rather than finding out when you woke a few hours later.

I honestly think there is no right or wrong answer and you just need to do what is right for your family and follow guild lines with regards to bumpers, blankets etc

Our two never came into our room. In their room from night 1 at home. Not advising or suggesting but simply answering op as it is what we did.

All three of ours went into their own room/space after they outgrew the moses basket. Everyone slept better: the babies, me and my husband.

I think people overthink things sometimes... do what works for you.

Please don't make your decision based on these anecdotes - " I did it at x weeks and they were fine" is irrelevant.

There is an increased risk of SIDS, you need to consider if you are willing take that risk, it's just like any other decision we make as parents. The fact that another person's child was fine is meaningless.

I agree with MyDarling.
Anecdata only serves to make you feel better about your own decision if others have made the same one!

I agree. The data shows that the risk increases but it is still a small risk so of course the vast majority of people who do this do not see a negative outcome. Anecdata really isn't helpful.

What is far far more dangerous than putting your baby in their own room is being exhausted and following unsafe coalescing practices.
I know a number of my friends have said that they end up taking the baby into their bed and falling asleep, waking up with a start to find the baby with their face smushed up against their pillow, or has wriggled under the duvet, or has fallen in the gap between the bed and wall (yes this happened).
If no one is getting proper sleep then it is safer all round to put your baby in their own room.
I adhere completely to the other SIDS guidelines of back to sleep, feet to foot, nothing in the cot, no smoking etc.
But this is the one where we need to exercise judgement IMO.

Coalescing = cosleeping

At 4 months as I'm a restless sleeper and kept waking her up. Should have done earlier.

To the person who said they would never do it for convenience... I assume you never travel by car for convenience as I imagine the chance of being in a crash is far higher than the risk of cot death.

These guidelines are just that- guidelines. If you are exhausted and the baby is exhausted as you're not getting enough sleep you're at far greater risk of making a poor judgement call somewhere else that puts your baby at risk. Good luck.

I don't get all this 'weigh up the risk'. I ADORE my DS, therefore I don't take preventable risks with his life. The babies on here were fine, others died.

Are you saying that the rest of us don't adore our children then?

I got an awful lot of pressure from DH to put our second baby in his room early, but I refused to because I felt strongly that I should wait. He was quite a bastard about it, making me out to be being precious just because baby had been born at 35 weeks. I wasn't being precious, I just had a gut wrench every time I thought of it and it felt like leaving the baby in the middle of a busy road, everything in me screamed no!
So I ended up sleeping on an inflatable camping mattress in baby's bedroom with him.

One night he was whimpering softly, it almost sounded like heavy breathing as it wasn't enough to sound like a kitten meowing, and I wouldn't have heard it if I hadn't been cramped in bed next to him. I picked him up and was horrified to find he was freezing cold. The room temperature was the same as the night before, and the week before that, so I didn't know what was going on. I felt his back and stomach, and they were cold.

So I laid him on me under my bedclothes and tried to feed him. It didn't make a difference so after about 20 minutes I stripped us both off and did skin to skin. Eventually, after an hour, he was lovely and warm again. But it took a whole hour and I found he whole episode disturbing. But I was mighty glad to have been there that night. It was only the wee small hours (around 1-2am) and I hate to think what could have happened if he'd been left that cold for hours on end all night.

AStick
That sounds scary

Lapin I'm saying I don't take risks that could mean my child dies. Others do.

"I'm saying I don't take risks that could mean my child dies."

Really?!
As PPs have said, there are all sorts of risks involved in living your life. Travelling by car is a major one, but there are plenty of others. I refuse to believe you don't do anything that involves a small risk of death for your child.

It is easier to share a room with a baby than it is to avoid travelling by car, but as PPs have said, sleep deprivation can cause accidents, so they have weighed up the risks and make their decision.

It would be nice if we could have this discussion without accusing others of being "precious" or "martyrs" or carelessly risking their children's lives!

I don't mean to sound harsh, not me at all. I just feel so much pressure from people to take these risks and I think it's the same on here. Obviously I take my child in the car. I just try to minimise risks. I just don't get all the 'Your child could die from this' 'That's a risk I'm willing to take'.

5 weeks because she out grew her Moses basket. Very wriggly. So kept waking herself up in the confined space.
Cot didn't fit in our room, so in she went.
All good.

Caffeine well you do take risks if you take them in the car. That's when something bad is far more likely to happen, statistically, than a risk of SIDS.

My DM moved me into my own room at 13 months when she had finally weaned me off the boob, my little DB was in his own room at 12 weeks. We are both fine. I still have 8 mo dd in our room as she cosleeps and I can't be arsed traipsing back and forward between our rooms when she still feeds in the night, I get better sleep for not really having to properly wake up to feed. Sleeping apart raises the SIDS risk, but so many things do like formula feeding, I doubt anyone manages to avoid all the risks. Yes u just have to weigh up the risks and the pros and cons and make your decision. I am going to get one of those mattress monitors when we move dd out of our room for peace of mind.

Yes I suppose I do, just not ones I can avoid. I'm really not trying to be an arsehole. I could have worded what I put better. I just feel for me atleast, people put so much pressure on you when you've had a baby to take risks with their life. So many people have told me my DS should be going up on his own at about 8 because their child was fine. But sometimes it's not.

There are risks in everything everyone does. It's up to everyone to decide what carries the least risk for them. For me and my family I wasn't able to function having my babies next to me all night to the point of developing severe pnd (on such a high dose of medication they don't even prescribe it anymore).

Travelling by car has far more risk than aids. We all (mostly) still do it because the benefit to us outweighs the risk. Eating stuff that isn't that healthy for us might not be good for us long term heart wise but lots of us will still do it because it's a risk - not a direct given.

We all have to make decisions about risk that we are comfortable with. Our whole lives are about risk evaluation really!