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People fixating / constantly commenting on how cute etc my child is

5 replies

megarabbit · 30/04/2017 19:48

It is VERY frustrating. He's quite honestly not that cute and yet gets it constantly. I need to be quite firm with him much of the time (likes things just his own way), and we're getting there on teaching him the world doesn't revolve around him - and then EVERYWHERE we go it's 'awwww hello cutie!', 'isn't he so cute!' and so on (in direct contradiction as you can imagine!). Supermarkets, buses, trains, waking, eating, whatever.

He's nearly flipping 5!

He's generally shy but all the eyes / attention / soppy smiles etc at him is obviously quite disconcerting and he often has to put on an act and pretend (imagine people staring at you, makes you think you have to do something, it's pressure). He's always been better in quieter environments and when the spotlight's not on him.

Part rant and part advice-seeking: interested to hear from others who've had or currently have this (so annoying when I'm trying to discipline him and you're getting "awwwww's", dissipating all the hard work!!); and if anyone's had any intriguing thoughts on dealing with it!

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Believeitornot · 30/04/2017 21:53

Maybe you're being too hard on him.

What sort of behaviour is bothering you (of his I mean)?

terrifictoddlers · 30/04/2017 22:37

Ah, feeling for you, I can see it really bothers you :( However, I would see it as a compliment! I really wouldn't read any more into it than that! Your little one clearly has a knack for drawing positive attention from people, which is a fab gift! (I wouldn't worry about it undermining your messages re: discipline! He's only 5! Smile roll with it and let him feel proud of the attention he receives! )

Potterypots · 30/04/2017 22:41

I don't think this is unusual - a lot of people really like kids, especially some of the older generation I have run into out and about. It's nice that they are complimenting him. Much better that than saying negative things about him!

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teaandakitkat · 30/04/2017 22:44

We get attention all the time because my son has curly hair. You wouldn't believe the number of times we are stopped so people can comment on it or touch it.
It's really wearing after a while, and he hates it.
So sorry, I have no solution, but I know how annoying it is. Even if people mean well.

megarabbit · 01/05/2017 07:27

teaandakitkat: you get it! As I say, he's coming out of toddler years, I understand that happening with a baby (when it was multiple times daily), but then they'd fixate on him at nursery (and if you think having your own personal line-up of servants doesn't affect you behaviour, Ha! Let's just say it does). There were a couple of great teachers who got it and were on it RE: not doing the staring & fixating thing.

It's less pronounced in France as they don't zero in so much on kiddies, but it's still there!

It's only if you've experienced it teaandakitkat that you can understand how frustrating it is!

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