Awful guilt over angry shouting at my children

[suilaruin]

Hi hope somebody can help or has done something similar. Last week something happened that caused me a lot of stress, which made me upset and very angry and I then ended up taking it out on my kids.

My two children 2 and 6 were at the time fighting over a box and both of them screaming and crying. I ended up screaming and swearing at them grabbed my 2 year old arms and shouted something then i said to my 6 year old get away from her you both need to be away from each other so I pushed him out the room and apparently dug my nails into him. Then not long after he was complaining of his tablet not working so i tried to fix it then I threw it back at him onto his bed but it bounced and hit his chest. I didnt mean for that to happen and the digging my nails in. I said I was sorry a few times now and explained I was upset and I was wrong to get so angry and it wont happen again and my son said its ok.
I also told my husband he said I was stressed already and im pregnant and dont worry about it the children are ok if they were not they would be scared of me.

I rarely get angry at them and I feel terrible like some sort of child abuser! :( am I overreacting?

You are not a child abuser. You obviously know what you did was wrong and writing out a long comment about how awful you were won't help.

It sounds to me like you have a lot on your mind, maybe a bit hormonal and just snapped. You're only human and it happens to everyone.

Have a cup of tea, calm down for half an hour and enjoy the rest of your day with your children. You've apologised and admitted you were wrong and that's all you can do.

Thanks for replying :) I just felt like the worse mum. I hate that I hurt by accident and the shouting. I don't like who I become when I get like that.

I wouldn't believe any parent who claimed they never got cross or spoke or behaved in a way that wasn't ideal. We are only human.
BUT if this is a recurring pattern you really must address that.

Yeah I guess that's true nobody is perfect after all!

My family are very poor at showing any kind of emotion - not in an uncaring way, but they are just very very reserved and keep everything inside and don't talk about things.
I behave in the same way, unsurprisingly, but I have come to recognise that it's not always healthy to suppress strong emotions all the time, and so I hope I can find ways of expressing emotions in a healthy way so that my children can learn how to deal with their emotions.
I'm not sure if I'm making my point very clearly but I'm trying to say that the ideal parent isn't necessarily one that is completely calm and serene and unflustered at all times. Clearly you have recognised that your reaction wasn't ideal either, but as a pp said, I'm sure that all parents are tested to their limits sometimes.

Thanks for replying has put it into perspective a bit still feel crappy though but children don't seem bothered at all by it as it was about a week ago now!

Children can push us but snapping doesn't make you a bad person or parent.

The fact you acknowledge what happened shows you care and love them dearly

Tomorrow is a new day