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Original poster

What did you struggle to explain to your dcs?

29 replies

KathyMCMLXXII · 12/03/2007 11:47

Had a day out with my nephews yesterday, which reminded me of one last summer when we went to the local 'maize maze'. There was a sign up advertising 'naked maze night' which we stupidly read out in front of our nephews (then 3 and 6).
Spent the rest of the day struggling to come up with an answer to incessant questions about 'But why do people want to go in the maze without any clothes on?'

What did you struggle with explaining to your children?

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feetheart · 12/03/2007 11:50

Not as much fun but ended up trying to explain 'Watergate' to my almost 4 year old a few weeks ago!!!

feetheart · 12/03/2007 11:51

Had to explain 'scandal' and 'president' along the way! That'll teach me

southeastastra · 12/03/2007 11:52

naked maze night?? blimey

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TeeCee · 12/03/2007 11:52

I think I'll find expalining the whole 'you have / your sister has Down's syndrome" a bit weird. Not quite sure if they'll just grow up knowing it or if it'll need to be explained.

Marina · 12/03/2007 11:52

Ds is extremely inquisitive and tends to challenge any parenting decision we make which is at odds with some the very liberal and wealthy other parents in his class, so we have to do a lot of repetition of "every family is different", "we are not Algernon's parents, we are yours" "You are not Algernon, you live in a house with different rules" ad nauseam some days
I did have a close shave with an Ann Summers shop spied from the upstairs of a bus once.
I told him it was fancy dress.

schneebly · 12/03/2007 11:54

I made the mistake of telling DS1 (3.5) this morning to drink his milk up because it is good for his teeth and bones. Then followed a lengthy discussion about bones and skeletons and how there could be a skeleton inside him. "I not eat a skeleteon silly Mummy!"

Marina · 12/03/2007 11:55

Oh don't even get me started on why we don't have the Euro, why does Michael Howard have something of the night about him, what is better about organic veg, why can't we just have Japanese food every day .... urgh.
Kathy - never read anything out to a small child. In all too short a time they will be doing that for you . On the same trip as we saw the Ann Summers shop we also saw a huge poster for that wretched film with Steve Carell playing a 40 year old virgin

ScoobyC · 12/03/2007 11:57

We have lots of comeback from my sil re things said, without thinking, to our nephew (under 6) which we then had fun explaining:

Elvis died on the toilet (actually quite a good one as seemed to put him off hamburgers for a while!)

Why our two friends, both with female names, were getting married

She can't wait til our ds (9mo) gets older

shouldbedoingsomethingelse · 12/03/2007 11:58

why WOULD anyone want to go NAKED into a maize maze?

Infact why would anyone want to go into a maize maze! I never can find my way out

northerner · 12/03/2007 11:59

After getting a Chinese takeaway, ds who is nearly 5 asked 'Do Chinese people die?' To which I replied yes, everyone dies when they get really old. So he came back with 'Does Father Christmas die then? Because then the little children won't get any presents'

Cue one stumped parent!

chopchopbusybusy · 12/03/2007 12:02

I'm not surprised your nephews are struggling with the concept of 'naked maze night' - I am too.

nailpolish · 12/03/2007 12:18

yesterday i was trying to explain what cheeks are for

Original poster
KathyMCMLXXII · 12/03/2007 12:19

I can see that if you were a swinger and bored of chocolate fountains a maze might be a way to liven up a party - eg you would be able to hear something good going on on the other side of a hedge and need to find your way to it - heightened anticipation etc.

(I am not, and have never been.....)

Not certain that was the point - maybe they just wanted to be naked and in the maze

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foxinsocks · 12/03/2007 12:25

Cancer - they found it hard to understand why you couldn't catch it like a cold/bug but could still get very ill

Had to explain snogging in public the other day (one of those World Book Day books was called Snogfest) and dd in Waterstones, very loudly, suggested ds might like to read it. Cue 'what's a snogfest mum' with lots of adults standing nearby sniggering.

JackieNo · 12/03/2007 12:26

But isnt' maize quite scratchy and not really compatible with soft fleshy bits. I'm puzzled too.

Had to stop listening to Radio 4 in the car in the mornings, as DD was requiring so many explanations about things - and it's not because I didn't think she should have some of them explained, just that I felt unequal to doing it.

mrsgenehunt · 12/03/2007 12:26

money, how much i earn, whether i have any money in the bank

mrsgenehunt · 12/03/2007 12:27

why anyone would want to see their knickers

Original poster
KathyMCMLXXII · 12/03/2007 13:12

Some of these are funny, others are really dark.

We struggled with food surpluses/world hunger as well - 'But why can't they just send all the food to the poor people in other countries?'
Um, search me

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becklespeckle · 12/03/2007 13:15

my mother had fun trying to describe what extinct was to my DSs (then 2.5 and 4)

happypiglet · 12/03/2007 13:58

Why are trees tall? Well why are they tall???????? I have no idea!!!!

Original poster
KathyMCMLXXII · 12/03/2007 13:59

Martianbishop probably knows that one.
Come to think of it, Martianbishop probably knows the answer to most of these

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ledodgy · 12/03/2007 14:06

My 3.11 year old dd asked me why mummy's sometimes have blood in their knickers. I managed to explain about mummy having an egg and daddy having the 'seed' and that when they decide to have a baby, daddy plants the seed in mummy and a baby grows (I managed to avoid all mention of sex) but in the months where they don't make a baby the egg sheds its lining and this is what the blood is coming out. I don't think I meant to get that far into it but didn't want to make up any old crap either. I said to her "Did you understand that?" and she said "Yes, thank you mummy" and carried on playing in the bath!

Niddlynono · 12/03/2007 19:06

DS1 asked why shampoo was called shampoo, "is it because it makes you need a poo or does it make your hair smell of poo?"

tortoiseSHELL · 12/03/2007 21:33

We've had to explain some interesting things. Driving up to the north last October, ds1 was reading all the place names, and demanding to know something about each one.
"Coventry, mum what's in Coventry"
"Um, a cathedral darling"
"Tell me something about the cathedral"
"Er, it was bombed in the war and rebuilt" (the only thing I know about Coventry)
"What was the war?"
"Er, lots of fighting sweetheart"
"When was it?"
"about 60 years ago"
"so 10 years before my school"
"(phew) yes". But no, he didn't stop there...
"Mummy...."
"Yes..." (with dread)
"why was there fighting?"
"Well, there was a man called Hitler, and he wanted to take countries belonging to other people"
"THat's really not very nice is it Mummy. That's stealing. And stealing isn't nice. Is it Mum. Mum, why did he want to steal countries?"
"Ask your dad!"

He is 5 btw.

exbury · 13/03/2007 11:57

How to blow your nose. He is 4, and he just doesn't get it. Anyone got a foolproof (DS-proof) method of teaching them?!