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Parenting

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6 year old and sexual behaviour

6 replies

Sugerbones · 08/03/2007 10:37

I posted about this a few months ago but it's escalated slightly and would like some advice. About 2 months ago my 6 year old son got on top of my 8 year old son and started bobbing up and down, I asked him what he was doing and he said "I'm having sex". I got cross and asked him where he'd heard and seen that and he said "at dad's". My 8 year old then told me that his dad's girlfriends 10 year old son had done the same to him and my younger son when they were there on their weekend visits.

I was going to talk to his dad but I decided to leave it and just talk to my son about why it was wrong.

Anyway today on the way to school my 6 year old's friend fell over and my son jumped on him and did it again telling his friends mother that they were having sex. luckily I'd told her of what had happened before so she was quite understanding but still shocked...as was I that he'd done it again.

I've now decided to talk to his dad but it's not going to go down well, his girlfriend dislikes me at the best of times so when I mention her son she's going to react badly and it will probably cause a row but surely I shouldn't just leave it? am I doing the right thing in talking to his dad?

I'm worried that if he does it at school they will get the social services involved I can't seem to get through to him to stop.

OP posts:
ticklemepink · 08/03/2007 10:51

i definately would tackfully talk to dad...make sure you dont sound like you are accusing anyone of anything...kids see and here things from a variety of places...media other kids etc...especially when kids are at school, if some kids have older siblings then info gets passed on?? anyway dont assume the worst (as i suspect you might be?) but also follow you instincts...also talk to both you children seperately or together...whatever you think would work best...do let the school know what has happened and that you are in the process of dealing with it...sometimes keeping them upto date or asking their advice stops them asuming the worst too...lastly...dont get cross with your son for doing this out of embaressment...or any other reason...this needs to be discussed and discussed some more...good luck on this though...

Sugerbones · 08/03/2007 10:59

Thanks, how do you think I should word it when i speak to him? I was thinking of just explaining what has happened (both examples) and saying "when I asked where they'd seen that they said at your house and that whilst they were playing S* had done it as a joke...could you talk to them all?" or does that sound too accusing?

OP posts:
ticklemepink · 08/03/2007 11:03

firstly ...how supportive is x of parenting issues?

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Sugerbones · 08/03/2007 11:05

He's not very supportive really, he will tell them off if I report bad behaviour but has been known to laugh about it too. He is VERY controlled by girlfriend (she's 20 years older than him) and he will jump to her tune.

OP posts:
Bozza · 08/03/2007 11:07

I think I would try to speak to him privately without the gf there. And just report the facts, say you are concerned, what do you think we should do about it.

ticklemepink · 08/03/2007 11:20

totally agree with bozza

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