advice needed pls, 5-1/2 yr old never out of nappies at night

[jema]

happy, content, mischevous,very bright little dd2. have tried many times to get her out of nappies at night from age of 3, at whits end as going to stay with others soon, she's very embarrased she still wears them, (runs up stairs to make sure they're hidden if her friends are round to play), we've tried every thing over the years, bribery , rewards, all the HV recomendations, its gone on so long now,we dont make a great fuss about it or get crosss, just frustrated- i need some other views- our last endeavor on someones idea was something really important to her, tangiable, so that it was there all the timefor her to see , that she could only have when there were signs of improvement- a trampoline in the garden, after a couple of weeks you could see this was torturing her, she was bringing down "unused nappies" & saying that she'd been dry that night, the real one was hidden behind the radiator--help please, i dont want her to start hiding things or not talking openly to me- help please

thanks for that ghosty, the alarms are quite expensive, we've tried to borrow one , but the HV wont get involved til dd is 8,
perhaps I'll see if any one has one to borrow / hire off MN
thanks to you all

I don't want to put a damper (ha ha) on your enthusiasm for the alarm system but my parents tried it on me and it was a disaster and all more upsetting for me. By the time the alarm went of my bladder would be in full flow and unstoppable. So not only would I have the upset of wetting the bed but I would have the humiliation of being awake while I did it. After a couple of weeks of tears from me and then discovering that I was disconnecting the alarm as soon as they had left the room my parents finally agreed to stop using it. Please please please give your poor daughter a chance! She may just still be too young to be dry and all these efforts to force her to be dry will just upset her more.

It is hard when it's the child herself who wants to be dry. jema, does she know that lots of children are still wet at night at her age?

"Approximately 15 to 20 per cent of five- and six-year-olds wet the bed" (from netdoctor ) - if she's in a class of 25, that means at least 4 others are still wetting the bed too. I don't know if that will make her feel better about it or not but it's worth a mention. Please try to make her feel that she just isn't ready yet and it doesn't matter if it takes a while longer.

Have you tried DryNites? They are much less nappyish!

None of my three were dry before 7. We used to make a bit of a joke about it to be honest and blame their daddy because nana said he wet the bed too We tried star charts etc but usually its something that will just happen when their bodies are ready and it certainly runs in families. Our HV was also unwilling to help with the alarm although we did manage to get one for ds2 through the school nurse - could you try them?

Yes, please don't worry her too much about it. Otherwise I'm sure it'll all get horribly out of hand.

Oddly enough, nobody really made a fuss when I wet the bed occasionally (I have wondered why, in retrospect - I wasn't a very happy little girl and I don't know whether there was a connection). I just learned to change the sheet and go back to bed.

Buy the trampoline, give her a kiss and tell her how many other kids do it?