discipline for 16 month DD

[LittleMonkiesMum]

DD has started to hit other children and am struggling to be heard when telling her to stop. I pick her up and remove her form the situation, then tell her not to hit. I feel like I sound very cross, but have been told I probably need to sound more cross, and raise my voice more. Really conscious that I don;t really want to end up shouting at DD as my Mum seemed to spend her whole life shouting at me.
Feel very sorry for DD as it really isn;t her fault, she has been 'playing' with DH and he has not only allowed her to hit him in the face for fun, but he stage falls for her and she understandably thinks this is hilarious! I've been bugging him for ages to stop in case she starts to do it other children, but he's only just started to 'hear' me and has agreed to stop now.
Any tips would be great x

See the discussion on Behaviour and Development about disciplining children for other people's benefit

She's 16 months old, she has no concept at all that what she's doing is not OK, so I would just say 'no, don't hit, be gentle' with appropriate body language - shaking head, looking sad, then show her how to stroke gently etc and just remove her from the situation for a minute (not in a time out way, more as a distraction) No need to make a huge deal of it, just make sure your partner is on board about not play-hitting.

I really don't think there's any need to shout or sound really cross, she won't understand and it's just not a nice way to be with a baby IMHO.

Thanks DaisyMOO, just been ploughing through the thread you mentioned. Very interesting. I suppose everyone's different, and whilst my highest priority is obviously disciplining DD in a way which will work for her, I have to be honest and admit that I do want other parents to see that I am disciplining effectively too. It's a real struggle to balance, prior to reading through other thread I hadn;t realised that I was so self conscious about this.
I agree about shouting at DD. She is a wonderful, sweet natured little girl and I would hate to shout at her, especially since it's our fault she's started hitting anyway! Talk about confusing her! Poor love!