For doctors wives or others who have dh/dp's who work irregular hours

[PetitFilou1]

Ds (just 3) is really struggling with dh not being at home when he's on call. He does non resident on call so he gets home normally at about 10pm, obviously well after ds/dd's bedtime. After a patch when dh is on call a lot, ds's behaviour goes markedly downhill and he starts coming into our room at night - I suspect to check that his dad is still there. Dh is also in the RAF which doesn't help as he does medical evacuations on top of normal on call - when he does this he can sometimes have less than a few hours notice to leave the house. Any suggestions as to how to explain this to a 3 year old - I have tried but he obviously doesn't feel reassured. I guess he'll start to understand more as he gets older but I'd like to find a way to help him feel more secure about it.

have a similar situation here. dds are now 10 and 8, and are so used to his irregular hours and the fact that sometimes they wake up and he has gone and wont be back for a week or so.

They handle it well. They MSN him alot. But I understand that is tricky with a 3yr old.

What about getting a webcam? Maybe if the time difference isnt too bad he could read him a bedtime story?

It's me who struggles. Its hard to have a social life.

Can you have a special toy that you only get out when Daddy's not there? Something his dad could give him and ask him to look after when he's not there? I have no idea whether that would work, but it might? I feel for you though - DS1 (2.10) would find that hard, I think, too.