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Parenting

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Grumpy grandparent when kids are not behaving

6 replies

EmmaMY · 15/11/2016 22:33

So, I've had my dad over from Sweden for the last week and most of the visit has been lovely. My 2 kids, 5yo & 3yo love him and he loves them and they have had a brilliant time together... until yesterday when the 3yo turned on him and has since refused to give him a cuddle since, even as he left for the airport. (Might have been due to him asking her to not throw crayons around 🙄) As I mentioned, she is 3 and like a mini teenager and up and down like a rollercoaster. My dad has taken serious offence to her not being his best friend and brought it up tonight and he seemed sooooo upset about it... I didn't really know what to say apart from the fact that she is 3 and he should try to not take it personally... well, to cut a long story short it somehow ended in a massive argument.
This is the thing, my dad is the loveliest guy in the world, but he doesn't know how to deal with anything but happy from my kids. And they are not always happy...

I have no idea on how to approach this with him, as I don't really think my kids have done anything wrong. Should I have been more sensitive and empathic with him perhaps!? I don't know... He has been sitting like a dark cloud in my kitchen all evening and has barely said a word... anyone in a similar situation!? Thanks in advance!

OP posts:
panad317 · 15/11/2016 22:39

Has your Dad has gone back to Sweden or is he in your kitchen?!

EmmaMY · 16/11/2016 06:45

He is no longer in my kitchen! 😬 He left at 6am this morning, so we did our good byes last night... woke up feeling like shit this morning. Oh well, we will sweep it under the carpet with nothing resolved... 🙄

OP posts:
greenfolder · 16/11/2016 06:50

I don't think you should leave it unresolved. Was he like this with you? Can't you just message him? Say more or less what you say on here? That your 3 old is 3 and doesn't have an adult set of emotions? That they adore him etc etc and nobody wants a visit to end on a source note?

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cansu · 16/11/2016 06:51

I kind of think you probably should have given three year old short time to sulk and then when he was leaving made it clear she was to come and say goodbye. Having said that he is the grown up and should have been able to cope with a three year old acting up without a load of drama.

EmmaMY · 16/11/2016 08:11

I did explain that 3 yo are emotional and that even though it's hard he shouldn't take it personally... but he just didn't want to hear it and just got more and more upset. He was exactly like this with us growing up, we were ALWAYS happy! Took years of therapy to sort me out as an adult! 😬 The 3yo wasn't necessarily sulking either, she just wasn't as cuddly with him... oh well, wasn't really much time to resolve it as he brought it up at 8pm last night and left in a 6am taxi this morning...

OP posts:
Thinkingblonde · 16/11/2016 08:20

Time he grew up. His emotions are his to deal with. Don't let him quilt trip his grandchildren because they are doing what children do...it's not their job to make him happy.

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