3 under 6 - when will it get easier?

[OnewaytoRio]

I'm really struggling with the realities of my life at the moment. I have 3 kids aged 5, 3 and 10 months, and I'm so tired of the constant battles with them, and the drudgery of getting through the same tedious to do list every day. I shout at them all the time, and then end up crying and hating myself because I've lost my temper (again). The 3 year old particularly knows how to push my buttons. The oldest one has now started to shout at his brother in the same tone of voice I use which worries me, I don't want them to grow up with the temper issues I seem to have. How do I stay patient with them? I would never smack them, but I just cannot stay calm at the moment. I don't want them to remember me as some shrieking nightmare.

I think when the youngest gets to 3 it should get easier.... That's what I tell myself. I've a nearly 4 yr old, 2 yr old and 11mth old.

I agree, ds2 got markedly easier when he turned 3, so that may be the watershed moment. Do you manage to stay calm? I'm torn between wanting time desperately to move on so it gets easier, but everyone saying "you'll regret wishing it away when they're older".

No, not calm:( overall other people say I'm calm but I feel like I lose it too much, though always really when I've been left on my own minding them for hours on end so obviously other people don't see me losing it then. It's very very stressful and I feel terrible that I sometime spend patches snapping at them and throwing my eyes up as all the little things add up throughout the day. I have found my self roaring at the 2 yr old 'why would you do that! Why would you do that!' when all ages done is draw on the table with a pen but it's the straw that broke camels back stuff and she looks at me confused while I roar and hold back tears. It's very hard. But we do need to learn to control ourselves better in these high stress situations. I do think however that my temper won't flare when they stop being so little, I dont naturally have a temper and hadn't lost it for 15yrs before the kids came along.

It's the constant assault physically, mentally and emotionally of small children. I defy anyone to hold it together when a baby you adore cries and clings and rages about God knows what for an hour straight while two other little people you love scream and bicker at each other while demanding things (snacks, sellotape, put my sock on, I knocked my drink again, I need a poo) non stop that you have to do with one hand as the food you're trying to prepare boils over and you bend your fingernails back opening the fridge. It's hugely stressful for moments throughout the day but then suddenly all is calm. But it's too late, you've already yelled and lost it during the chaos.

I hear you Inthenick. Good to know I'm not the only one. I'm the same - I wouldn't have said I had a particularly short fuse before I had kids. It's the constant demands that get me too - just when you think you can sit for 5 minutes, someone's bum needs wiping. We will get through this!