Can I have a hand hold please?

[LadyFlumpalot]

I'm slowly losing at life at the moment.

1. DS (5) banged his head on the kitchen floor (tile) and it was kinda my fault, I was walking backwards with him, thought he was holding onto me, let go of him and he fell backwards.

Now I'm tying myself into knots about brain bleeds etc.

He was happy, alert, not sick and wolfed down his tea and supper so probably fine, but I'm still worrying.

2. DD (3) has been in and out of hospital with joint pains, drs saying 99% chance just irritable hip but 1% chance of arthritis or the scary L word due to some abnormalities on blood tests (high protein, low wbc). We've been discharged today with an open pass to the ward, but she's just woken up absolutely screaming in pain. I'm taking her back in if it happens again.

3. Period started today and my fucking hot water bottle split last week. Not even the good stuff (feminax) is helping.

4. we are completely skint - skipping meals so the kids can eat skint.

Please hold my hand and tell me funny stories, I just want to cry and cry and cry. That or drive into a tree, just hard enough so that I can go to hospital for a bit and get some rest. Check out of reality for a bit.

Ugh. Pity party or what?!?

No actually. Entirely reasonable list of troubles, one of which in their own would cause most people to be stressed. You poor thing.

Fair play, that's a rough week. Hunker down with a cuppa and some chocolate if you can.

Funny stuff - best I can do today is a toddler meltdown story. My 2yo was having a shit fit about having to walk from car to front door this evening. I eventually get fed up, stick her under one arm and start marching. She literally spits her dummy on the pavement in rage. I decide that's a nice lesson in cause and effect so I don't pick it up and keep walking. Passing handsome man says "I'll get that for you" and I snarl at him "NO, SHEWILLHAVETOLEARN". Poor man physically flinched. I am basically a cartoon witch

OP - that all sounds tough.

DH was just messing about with the new Amazon Echo thingy that talks back to you, at the same time as battling DD's homework.

He asked Amazon Echo 'Alexa' something, then about 30 seconds later it pipes up "I'm sorry, I cannot find Just do your homework in your music library"

Hope things get better for you soon.

Thanks lovely people. You've all helped immensely!

Haha to the dummy spitting! Darn helpful handsome people!

Siri once replied to my snarl of "just use your fucking indicators you twat" with "I'm sorry"!

That sounds like a rough week. Hope things get better.

Sherlock Holmes and Watson are camping. Sherlock points at the sky and says 'Watson what do you deduce from that'. Watson thinks, then says 'Well, I think that with so many stars and still far more that we can't see there must be an unimaginable number of planets, and with so many planets there must be some that can sustain life, and of those perhaps there are some where creatures like us live. What do you deduce?.' Sherlock sighs and says 'Someone's stolen our tent'.

That's brilliant, Albert!

I'm raising a tantrumming pedant. I tried to put my three year old in time out on the way home from school pick up today. She was acting dangerously and had hurt me. I had to smile however when I missaid "just stay there on the naughty chair" whereupon she looked down and said "but there's no chair!"

Sounds awful, OP. This week DS changed my phone setting so that Siri calls me Poo Face.

You need your sound turned on, but this never fails to make me smile

Sounds like a very difficult time for you