Now I'm back at work, surely I should have more patience with DS rather than less ?

[rookiemum]

Just like it says really.
DS is 10mths and I went back a few weeks ago, 4 days a week. On Saturdays ( I work tue - fri) I find it really hard when he starts crying particularly as he has melt downs now when you take things away from him, which I know is totally normal.

I'm feeling really guilty because I thought that because I would only be seeing him properly 3 days a week ( although I look after him 7-8.30am and 5pm -7pm the other days) I would have more patience, yet I seem to have less and find it harder than work, although I do love him to bits.

Is this normal or am I just a freak ?

that sounds familiar. I found it incredibly difficult adjusting back into work. It took at least 3mths.

Although you think you're going to be able to enjoy your limited time because of work but then there's all the other bits - housework, laundry etc that somehow is being squashed into the short space of time.

No great words of wisdom but it does get better. I also found that making dh sharing an equal part of the household chores helped and at least 2hrs on a saturday which was "me" time, even if I just sat on the bed with the paper.

Is he also playing you up becasue you've gone back. You may find things settle down in time.

Phew, I'm glad someone replied, I thought that I was a freak !

Thing is DH is being marvellous and is doing a lot of the household chores as me going back to work has coincided with him being in between jobs, although he is starting again in March, so I have had an easy start in.

I'm actually enjoying work but it is tiring and I just feel I don't get any time to relax, but hey I guess thats just what being a parent is about.

Sorry suejonez, crossed posts.

I don't know he may be playing up, but its hard to tell if its that or just him being 10mths old.

He seems to be particularly grouchy on the Saturday then isn't so bad on Sunday and Monday so perhaps its him readjusting ?

Told my mum he was grumpy last Saturday and she said ooh perhaps he prefers being at the childminders, grrrrr.

I only ask becasue my DS is just doing a fw hours at a childmeinder in advance of me going back in a few weeks and he is distinctly more clingy/whiney when he's been but not immediately (a fw hours later). He is a little old (1yr) but I wonder if its the same thing.

Also i think you have a vision of the time you have together being lovely and warm and fluffy and you will be so much more patient with him... and real life rarely works out that way! I bet it settled down - I'm dreading the transition as I think mine will punish me big time for a few weeks!

And ignore your mother, mine is convinced that I will never see my child again and says to him "has mummy taken you to the nasty childminer?" - I know he doesn;t understand yet but it winds me up a treat.

It's sometimes difficult to adjust from one world to another - I work Tuesday to Thursday, and I find Fridays quite difficult sometimes. I always make sure we have something to do - usually swimming, or we'll go into town. Something one-on-one that doesn't involve dd interacting with other kids unless she wants to (we went to a toddler group for a couple of terms, but she would only ever sit on my lap, I finally figured out she just wanted a bit of mummy-time after three days at nursery). Then Friday afternoons are usually the time we see friends, as after the morning she seems a bit more secure, and ready to play with ONE other child.

Oh, suejonez, to your mother!

Conversely, I suspect my mum knows most childminders would do a better job of looking after dd than I do.