when/where is it OK for children to go nude?

[hovely]

I feel out of touch with general opinion on this one. Aside from hygiene & sun protection issues, is it OK or not OK for a small child to be nude/bottomless - on the beach? in the park? in the paddling pool at the park? on a campsite? in somebody else's garden? in your own garden if it's overlooked?
If it's OK up to a certain age, then what age?
Is it different for boys/girls?

I'm wondering how much kids take their cues on these things from their parents. Some parents seem quite relaxed about the subject, others seem quite conservative or are so concerned that they consciously to to cover their children up.

I do think that girls seem to be less shy about their bodies than boys though, especially after age 6 or so.

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We shared a house on holiday in Dorset last summer with another family. I knew them quite well, and we got on fine. After the beach the kids were covered with sand and they always had a bath or shower. My friend used to take the kids' costumes off just inside the front door, and they'd head into the bathroom.

Nobody minded, it just seemed to be what they did, and they didn't seem to be at all shy even when my husband was there.

What if a pervert is reading about all this and enjoying it???

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I think it would require a fair stretch of the imagination to get any 'thrill' from this conversation. In any event I would expect that there own sick imaginations could conjure up far more explicit images that a simple discussion about appropriate wear for children.

The alternative is to go as far as not discussing such issues openly for fear that someone is 'reading'!

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Seems the weirdos have won

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It does indicate though the extend to which such concerns moderate the way WE behave. Maybe using the term 'won' is not the best way of expressing it, but I do feel that our freedom to make free choices or to discuss such subjects is tainted by our fears about what is probably a very small percentage of the population.

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Blu, maybe you've been affected by that guy who fell through the ceiling!! Let's not start seeing perverts everywhere.

Justmum (I was only joking, anyway!)

Glad to hear it! I posted this in the Travel thread as well - our family has decided to try the naturist beach, so I hope the weirdos stay well away!!

I think it's a mistake to think that because we are more aware of paedophilia, we are therefore protecting our children more. The same number of children get raped and murdered by the rare lunatic paedophile as thirty years ago; apparantly it is in the region of 5-8 children per annum, and it hasn't changed in thirty or forty years. We are much more aware of it, and much more paranoid, but whether that protects children from abuse is a moot point. Most abuse is perpetrated by family members or friends, people who are known and trusted by parents; people whom parents would have no problems whatsoever in allowing their children to be naked around. But would all those people who say that they would not allow their children to be naked in public also not allow their kids to be naked around very close family friends, for the same reason? Not being provocative, I'm interested - I know that I am ridiculously careful about ensuring that I don't allow (some) helpful (male) friends to eg bath the children for longer than about five minutes, because at the back of my mind I have the consciousness that they might be paedophiles. Not that I think for one moment that they are, but I behave as if they are just in case. Which is probably mad. But I have no problem at all with allowing them to run around nude(the kids, not the male friends!) because I suppose I don't really care what people think, it's what they do that counts, for me. I hadn't realised that before this discussion.

paedophilia never really entered my life except what i saw on the telly. however since moving to the coast its in my mind all the time. working for a housing association i know that we house a number of paedophiles as we have a "social" duty to do so believe it or not. i hear of many more abductions and rapes and failed abductions than i ever did up north. a child nearly got abducted last week five minutes drive away from my house - and a woman intervened and fought off the man. its scary. i really wouldn't want anyone to let their toddlers go paddling nude or just in undies for those reasons.

Meanbean - why would you have any male friends bathing your children???

The only people to bath my kids are me and dp.

Secur, I wasn't aware of the accusation thing, sorry to hear that. What happened? (I'll understand if you don't want to talk about it).

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Found the (lengthy) thread, dreadful story but I'm glad it was sorted out. Must have been truly awful for you.

I'm still a bit surprised about the posting below where a male friend was allowed to bath some children. What's that about?

I'm really surprised that people are hung up on the bath thing. If it's bedtime and friends happen to be in the house - male or female - then we'll be chatting in the bathroom and they'll help get the kids out of the bath, dry them and get them into their jim-jams. And sometimes they'll read them a story too. It's just another normal activity, like helping out with lunch if it's lunchtime, or joining in doing homework or something. I don't see bathtime as being any different - but that's possibly because my children are quite young and haven't yet developed embarrassment about being naked. What's the problem with it, if one assumes ones friends aren't child-molesters? Not being confrontational, just interested to see why it's provoked such a strong reaction.

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