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Setting boundaries for an 18 month old?

6 replies

apatheticfallacy · 20/09/2016 11:20

My 18 month old DS is an absolute delight most of the time, but he's just starting to test the boundaries of acceptable behaviour and I thought I'd get some advice on how more experienced mothers deal with it.

For example today he was trying to knock my coffee cup or of his hand. I usually say "No! Hot!" and he'll stop and approach more cautiously. Recently he's just been laughing and trying harder to spill the coffee. The more serious I sound about it the more he laughs. So I've been getting up and walking away to avoid adding further fuel to the fire.

I really want him to learn clear boundaries without too much aggro on the way (don't we all?!)

What do you do when your toddler starts being a little shit acting up?

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TeaBelle · 20/09/2016 11:23

I try to redirect to desired behaviour as 'no' loses meaning after a while. So iin your situation I would ask dd to make me tea with her toy kitchen or something else. I do do 'hot, don't touch' but not when she's necessarily trying to get at it, more as an everyday thing

TeaBelle · 20/09/2016 11:25

I also praise as much as possible, so if dd fpes something on the first time of asking she gets a huge fuss. Subsequent requests get a well-done, thank you dd but I'm hoping that it will help her desire to comply with requests!

YokoUhOh · 20/09/2016 11:26

Distraction, at this age. 'Look at that plane in the sky!'. Also, praising desirable behaviour: 'well done for being careful'.

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YokoUhOh · 20/09/2016 11:28

Ah X-post! My nearly 4 year old DS is only just getting the importance of complying with requests and even then will keep trying stuff on. Its because they feel 'safe' to try things with us; in a different setting they might be more cautious.

apatheticfallacy · 20/09/2016 11:30

Great advice here, thank you! (Off to go re-direct DS away from the dishwasher...)

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TeaBelle · 20/09/2016 11:36

The other thing that we did when dd was reasonably mobile was to set up an area that she can't hurt anything. For us it's the living room - we have it so that the coffee table blocks access to the TV and there is nothing else in here that she can hurt/can hurt her. As such she has free reign in here so I have a space where I don't need to constantly be on alert. I also got a collapsable playpen for the kitchen when I need to cook but she hates that so a no go for us

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