At what age did you have "the talk" with your children?

[uhoh2016]

Did you even have the talk or just leave everything to the sex education given in school? Ds is in y5 I think they do have some sort of sex Ed this year in school.
Also did mums speak with daughters and Dad's with son's? I'm asking cos I think his Dad will be much better than me especially talking about boy bits and feelings etc

I suppose the big question is how to ensure kids get info even when they don't want to know it and will change the subject or run away whenever the idea of growing up comes up?
Ds is 8 and we're pretty good on periods (bathroom lock keeps breaking), private parts that only you get to touch, or parents or doctor if necessary (so wash yourself you lazy git), and sperm and eggs and pregnancy vs reptiles where they hatch out of eggs (there's a crap book about a baby dinosaur and older sibling where Mummy Dino is pregnant...), and it's more common for boys to want relationships with girls than boys when they are older, like it's more common to be left-handed, but actual sex and really having relationships, doesn't want to know.

For the next couple years it's probably OK to see he still has girl friends and tackle any stereotypes that come up, I hope.

Funnily enough my sons asked me about condoms tonight. They wanted to know what they were for so I asked them what they thought. The youngest one knew they stop babies being made but thought the condon would be put on the tummy.

The eldest looked a bit puzzled and wanted to know what water balloons had to do with pregnancy.

So all those questions were for nothing...

On a separate but related note, can anyone recommend a good age-appropriate book for my 11yo dd covering puberty, sexual health, reproduction etc.? She's had all the talks in school, and I've obviously spoken to her quite a lot about periods and puberty, as well as a bit about relationships, reproduction and the mechanics of sex etc., so she definitely knows the basics. However, I've become increasingly aware that my own education on some of this stuff was pretty hazy tbh, and I've realised that I'm a bit vague on some of the detail myself.

My boys are 8, 5 and 3. The oldest two know how babies are made (well the egg plus sperm bit, not how the sperm gets in), they also know where babies come out, how girls wee and about periods. This is all because they have asked questions (mostly whilst pestering me as I'm on the toilet...) and I've answered them truthfully. They don't need to know much about periods because they aren't going to have them. Willies are not my department and DH deals with questions in the same way. He can deal with erections, masturbation and wet dreams too. I am not looking forward to wank socks and crusty tissues...

No big talk but answering questions or mini discussions whenever appropriate. We always had books about. I had quite detailed books with photos about when they were teens. It meant the kids could look things up safely if they needed. it's not a good idea for them to try and look up sex stuff online and I had my parental controls on my internet settings wouldn't allow sex Ed sites.

The only time I insisted on a proper talk usually in the car so they couldn't escape was when they first became sexually active and I wanted to double/triple check that they would take responsibility for contraception for themselves . I wanted to spell out that they mustn't rely on their partner however sensible they were.