I know you're all going to tell me I'm being silly.......
I'm about to give birth to #2. I feel extremely bonded with her already, I can almost picture her and am constantly imagining her tiny squishy body in my arms. Feel very emotional about her.
I have a little lad, who I adore. Amazing child, was always easy and delightful.
BUT during my last pregnancy and the early months of his life I was going through very stressful and all consuming times with terminal family illness etc, and whilst I didn't get PND (miraculously) I didn't bond with him for a long time. I just didn't have space in my head or heart. I don't really blame myself, it was a gruelling time and I could only do so much. I was a good pleasant mother throughout, just totally disconnected. It was like I was babysitting a friend's baby. Or a puppy. All very cute, but that's all. He didn't mean much to me. And he was often downright inconvenient when I had very poorly adults to take care of 24/7.
I finally bonded with him after everything was over and I finally had the space to properly focus on him. He was about a year old I guess? Am very emotional about him too now, and fiercely proud of him.....but only since around then.
Now I'm starting to feel very anxious about the contrast in my feelings already!
I am almost afraid that the guilt I have successfully avoided thus far will crash down like a ton of bricks when I find myself feeling so different about #2!
If you bonded better initially with #2, how did it make you feel?
I'm being ridiculous, aren't I? Tell me to get a grip!