Taking a baby with me while I work in SE Asia

[littlefrog]

I'm hoping that lots of people with experience of this kind of decision will be able to help!

I'm expecting our first baby in April. Slightly complicated story, but before I got pregnant I had a grant to go and do about 4 months research in East Timor, which I have postponed. I'm now having a big worry about whether and when I'll ever be able to do this research. It'll involve being some way from the capital city, most likely living in fairly basic conditions. I won't have my own transport, nor will I be under the umbrella of any organisation that can help me if I/baby get ill. Country is malarial, infant mortality is just dreadful, health care in the capital is ok, but not great (people go to Darwin if they get badly ill)

I've done this kind of thing before, pre-baby, and I know that whilst I love it, it can be pretty tough - both mentally, and health-wise. Having thought at first that I could definitely find a way to do this, I'm now in the process of convincing myself that even the idea is insane and irresponsible.

What do people think? DH might be able to come with me for a bit (not the whole four months though). At what age would this be least difficult? Or should I scrap the whole plan and just give my money back?

Sorry this is long... don't know what to do!

hey - not sure if there will ever be a right time with a lo - what do the locals do? what does your hv/gp say? could you take an au pair/ nanny with you? how will you feed baby?
good luck with your decision and your research x

anyone else?
don't have a hv yet, as baby not yet born!
as for taking a nanny/au pair - not sure i can afford that (grant not that generous).
Advice anyone??

im sure you could ask to speak to the hv who works out of your surgery/local clinic - have you checked out any other internet sites? sorry i cant be of any help

Well having lived in SE Asia I have some idea of the conditions/issues you would be facing. (Although I lived in cities).

How old would your LO be when you go?

Bear in mind that your LO would have to have lots of extra jabs on top of the normal baby vaccinations. Can babies take malaria tabs (although we knew a malaria specialist in Bangkok and he didn't recommend taking them at all).

You will be taking your LO away from your DH for a long time.

I have to say that if it were me I wouldn't do it.

But if you really want to then do as much research as possible and sit down with your DH and do a list of pros and cons.

Who would look after your baby whilst you are doing your research? Or do you plan on strapping the baby onto your back as you work?

well you keep on putting your fingers right on the middle of the problem which makes me feel that I AM mad even to think about it.
Research involves interviews and chatting - some could be done with baby on back, but not much, so I'd have to find somebody to look after it.
Actually at this stage DH is being v encouraging about my going (more positive than me!) - quite rightly thinks that this isn't something that's going to get any easier.
I wish I knew someone else who'd done something like this - colleagues who have taken little children on research are all male, and have conveniently had wives who would do the childcare...

Maybe there's a reason why you haven't met any other mothers who have done this, and that's because it's just too hard and risky.

Too hard meaning that you're already finding it hard to find someone who can look after the baby.

Too risky from what you say: 'Country is malarial, infant mortality is just dreadful, health care in the capital is ok, but not great'

I know plenty of people who have travelled with children , but not quite the same as what you've described.

I admit, to do this sort of research is a chance of a lifetime, but so too is having a baby.

I wonder how you'll feel once your baby is born?

LittleFrog,it could work.
If you breastfeed and sling carry it might not be too bad.However,if you are on your own,the pace will be relentless which will impact on your work.

I lived near East Timor for a long time (PNG) and have friends who have spent years in East Timor(one unfortunatley was killed there a few months ago-accident).
It's not the safest of places at the moment..

I was wondering what your advice would be moondog - glad you saw this thread.

agree about the breastfeeding - I don't think there's anyway you could easily sterilise bottles, bf is far more convenient and would provide your baby with much needed antibodies in this situation.

Think of the hassle lugging a carseat about too.
I'm all for carrying on with your life and travelling with tinies but I would think twice about this one,unless someone can come with you to help.

Least difficult time would be when baby about 12 weeks.
You will be feeling stronger,maybe baby going a little longer between feeds,but still very portable.

moondog and belgo, thank you v much for advice. interesting that you see 12 weeks as the ideal moment - if that's the case then I think I have my answer: don't do it. 12 weeks is just too tiny to have all the injections and things that I'd think were necessary.
Moondog, v sorry to hear about your friend. Roads are of course another thing to worry about, and as you say, it's not the safest place for now (actually, i couldn't go now - still on the FCO list of places not to go to, which means no insurance).
Had expected at least somebody to say yes, go for it: the fact that nobody has tells me a lot about the attitudes I'd likely come up against if I did this (and the blame I'd get if anything did go wrong)... helpful...

littlefrog - I think you're making the right decision - there will be other wonderful opprotunities in your life - opportunities that you will be able to share with your family. Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.