I want three, he wants two.

[DetentionGrrrl]

DP and i were talking last night, and we've decided that we'll start trying for another baby once my periods are back to normal after breastfeeding. DP said there was one condition though- we only have 2 kids. I've always seen myself having a minimum of 2.

I burst into tears! It was a totally unexpected reaction, and i was really shocked- DP was aswell.

I feel sad thinking that there'll only be one more baby and that's it.

I know how you feel. When we 1st got married dh and I agreed we'd have 3 kids. We know have 2 kids (a girl and a boy), now that we have one of each dh has said he doesn't want anymore. Mainly because my pregnancies have been pretty bad with morning sickness, bleeding and I ended up in hospital with both pregnancies. I was shattered when he 1st said it, I hate pregnancy but I love kids, I always thought that I'd have atleast 3. We have talked it through and we have decided to revisit the subject in a couple of years.

So it is normal to feel that way, because it is really hard when you don't agree on something as big as having children. Also after having your second you never know how he will feel.

I used to want four (FOUR!!) children, since having my second I've actually decided that's quite enough for now and we'll review the situation re having a third in a few years' time.

I really don't wish to rationalise your feelings, because I can well imagine how hard it would be to have differing ideas to your partner onsuch an emotional subject but these are very early days. You are still breastfeeding and perhaps your hormones are a little unsettled post birth. So don't feel upset by your reaction - I felt at my most maternal and broody in the early days after giving birth both times.

All I can say is, give it time. Some people like to plan ahead, some people don't. You never know how you and your DH will feel in a few years' time.

BTW my friend's DH wanted two but she managed to persuade him to have a third and TWINS came along so now they have four! Thankfully he's absolutely fine about it and no doubt couldn't imagine life without them but doesn't that show how people (men!) will often change their minds quite easily!

I had same conversation with dh last night.

He always wanted 2. Now we have 2 I would love another .

Last night though he said we would need to start cuttintg back, spending less if we wanted another so methinks he is coming round to it.

Now I feel very nervous wondering if it the right thing to do.

my situation is i want 2 and hes not keen on having 3! ...

I really do think he'd happily have 3, but that last night he was thinking practically etc, which is pointless when it comes to kids in my opinion- if you over think it, there's never a good time.

I don't mean that to sound like i plan to make him have another, or trick him in any- i would never conceive an unwanted child. He always said when we met that he wasn't bothered about having kids, then he said one, then he said two...

I was amazed at how emotional i became the second he said it- i felt like i was having a baby 'taken' from me!

Never mind- it's been a few weeks since i stopped breastfeeding, so i'll just wait for my elusive periods and think about the little brother or sister for DS for now.

I wanted 3....Dh wanted 2....we now have 4.

I think this may change as dh and I have changed our minds a number of times over the amount of dcs we want. When we first got married we both wanted a big family (5 or 6), then after dd2 was born (now 4) we decided we would stop at 2, we have now decided we would like another one and we are going to start ttc soon.

LTH I think it is your story which has made dh want another

He even asked if you had had your boy yet???

DP said our second would be our last but he knew I wanted another. Recently he said we should try for another one. He may change his mind so don't get to upset about it now.

I would love to have 3. DH says we have 2 lovely boys and we don't need any more, but I just don't feel like our family is complete.
He originally only wanted one. DS2 was a bit of a happy surprise (eventually for DH).
I wouldn't trick him into having another so I am hoping he will change his mind.
It doesn't help that I now have 5 friends who are pregnant, and my sister is expecting too

Don't get too upset. He's already agreed to the next one . One step at a time. After the next one you might find that you don't want anymore or he might find that he can cope with the idea of 'just one more' or he might be really keen for the next when he sees how well your family is with 2. He might just feel overwhelmed at the prospect of lots at the moment.