Just need a rant...

[utterlyconfused]

I don't really expect anyone to post but I feel so fed up and on my own. I have a 4yr-old with c/pox and he won't let me get on with anything and I have such a busy week. I have no relatives nearby to help take the strain and dh is away a lot at the moment. I have spent months trying to find after-school help for ds1, dd and this terror ds2 but to no avail, and now I'm trying to find someone to take ds2 (a pre-schooler) for just one afternoon a week (instead) and all the girls who responded to my ad are now not returning phone calls or emails. I really really need some support and no-one seems prepared to give me any. I'm tired and and I don't want to take it out on my kids but of course that's happening.

Poor you. I'm no help really but just wanted you to hear a friendly e-voice! Can you put a video on for a bit and have a cup of tea on your own?I know when they're ill can be hell on earth .I'm like you with no rellies close by - sometimes it would make all the difference if someone could take them just for a few hours to give you a break. Do any of the nurseries near you offer any after school clubs? Some of my friends say they're invaluable, but I don't know how it works. Otherwise... maybe your health visitor knows of childminders in the area with free space. HTH

Thanks for posting. It'll sound like a stream of excuses but a childminder or a nursery is not an option. We have various issues which I am in the process of trying to resolve and one-on-one is what he needs.
Believe me I have tried video, cbeebies, cbbc, but he likes to be involved. Will only stick at them for about 20mins.

Message withdrawn

Oh dear I really sympathise ! My 3yo (who's recently had c/pox btw) won't let me out of his sight for a second...I feel I barely get a break because his morning at playgroup goes by so fast it's over only too quickly.

I try to go with the flow and expect him to trail me but my God it's hard sometimes. Like if I want him to stay put for 10 seconds while I rush to another floor to fetch something, he won't have it, he just bellows to come with me. So even fetching a jumper from the cupboard becomes a very stressy ordeal, and if I take him with me it takes 3 times as long etc etc. I've long since given up on the idea of a wee in peace, but that's the least of it.

Sorry I've jumped in here with a whinge of my own. But at least you're not alone. Most of the time I keep telling myself to act cheerful and upbeat, and he'll copy rather than whinging, and if you relax into the "velcro toddler" mode of existence rather than fighting it, it will be easier...better go and take my own advice then.

sympathise with you...been there done that etc etc...i agree with wanderingstar though...go with the flow dont try to resist...if you can involve them great...if not and you have to go do something ultra quick like get a jumper...then go get it, telling them what you are going to do and keep talking to them while you are doing it...my children got used to me singing the grand old duke of york at the top of my voice (really shouting it !!!0...they loved to join in too...gets rid of stress too!!!...as an alternative to tv what about cd roms...it takes a bit of input from you but setting up jobs like the ironing in the same room might be less stressful. it takes bloody ages but at least you get something done at the same time.

If you have a college near you that trains nursery nurses (NNEB) you might get one of their students - either on placement as part of their training, or as a part time babysitter in their free time. I did this when i first moved to my current home and mine were small. It worked very well, and the students had been police checked and everything. I contacted the college and they put me in touch wioth the senior tutor.