so what one-liners/comebacks to you have when your los are cheeky/grumpy/rude...

[poppiesinaline]

dd: "Can I have a biscuit for pudding mummy?"

me: "yes, you can have a biscuit after you have had either a banana or apple"

dd: >"Oh fine then. I'll have a stupid banana please"

me: "Here is a stupid banana as apposed to a clever one. This one didn't pass its maths test"

dd:

is no-one else smart like me and have witty remarks to give their off-spring?

You do realise, you'll get it right back at you in a few months?

I think humour is great, it breaks the tension and gives everyone a smile. My dd is 9 and I do get it back but since the use of humour was never mean, sarcastic or demeaning, when I do get it back, it comes out as just funny, not mean we all laugh and it helps really. I wish I had been able to use your line, great one.

DD (2.3) agreed with me yesterday (sort of). I was showering and she came bursting in so I told her to close the bathroom door, to which she replied "Yes Mammy because it's buddy freezing!"

DH to blame for such language?

Dh always says to any child who is even hinting at whining. "would you like cheese with that?" most kids are so confused they forget to whine in fact it takes a while for the adults to get it too.

I pride myself on running verbal rings round my 3 year old (not difficult let's be honest ).

Will try to look out for some one liners today - I always forget them as soon as they are past. Will also look with interest at other people's techniques.

DS: "No way"
Me/DH: "Yes way"

DS: "But Mummy..."
Me: "But DS..."

it drives him nuts

also the only "baby" word we have managed to hang on to is "cheesing" for "teasing" - DH winds DS up all the time, and he is very good at playing along - although I do sometimes get "Mummy, Daddy is cheesing, isn't he?"

if they go too far i get my mobile out and start videoing the tantrum, that tends to stop them in their tracks