what do you do when your child is sick?

[badg3r]

We have an ad hoc system where we take it in turns to take a day of annual leave if DS can't go to nursery. Occasionally if it's actual time off for a doctor appointment I will take a sick day. Is having all your annual leave sucked up by ear infections, loose nappies and antibiotics normal for parents of nursery aged parents? DA has had seven ear infections since Christmas (now referred to specialist) and I realised today we don't have enough annual leave left for a summer holiday. I am exhausted, a week at home doing nothing sounds like HEAVEN. Sorry, first world problems, but I needed to vent!!

DS obviously!

It will be worse when he goes to school and you have 13wks to cover.

Thanks Mini

Hope you get his ears sorted soon though. Earache is very painful, poor thing.

Thanks! He finished his last antibiotics on Monday and we were back at the gp with another infection this morning! Poor thing.

Totally normal IME (not the ear infections, the using a/l when kids are sick.
Our policy is normally carers leave for the first day, with the idea being your meant to sort childcare out for the rest of the time or it's emergency annual leave. This is easier if you have family support nearby (which I don't) as most childcare providers won't look after a sick child.

I suppose if you wanted to keep your annual leave you could ask for unpaid days.

Me and DH usually split the time - he is lucky enough to be able to work from home at times which makes it easier although fortunately dd has been incredibly well (touch wood!) since she started school - think she caught everything possible from being at nursery since she was 11 mo, so it's likely that as time goes on, your dc will be ill less often.

Yep, totally normal I'm afraid, though we only had to keep ds out for 24 hours antibiotics, and I made routine drs appointments (and vaccs etc) for Friday afternoons when I could leave early without taking leave

We used a childminder and hardly had any illnesses which meant dd's had to be off. Dd1 had lots of ear infections but went to cm with antibiotics

DH and I share any time off, depending on who has what planned for the day.

Sometimes I take leave, other times I work from home - depends how sick dd is and how much "looking after" is required. Sometimes I just take the time off and make it up elsewhere.

Fortunately, we only have one DC and she rarely gets sick!

Glad he's on the mend. I am lucky in that I can work from home and my mum only works part time so can cover. Realise not everyone has those options.

Can you take a couple of weeks parental leave in the summer to allow yourself to get a holiday? Parental leave isn't paid but you might need to suck it up so you can get a break.

I take a sick day when one of mine is sick

Dh works term time only which is marvellous, and our CM is great with "they arent infectious and Ive no school runs today so send them to me" so our days are really low.

Dh also gets paid dependents leave but only for emergency days like this. If he has an important thing on at work, or if they are low on staff (work with kids so need certain ratios), I stay off.

I do work shifts though so if I was due in at 2.30pm, id call and ask if I could start at 5.30 once dh was home and id driven in. Usually thats fine.

to add, I don't get any annual leave in my job so a sick day is the only possibility

Aren't you allowed parental leave? I know it's unpaid but would a day here and there not be better than using up your annual leave before halfway through the year?

I take most of the days off, probably two thirds. My employer allows days off to look after kids - no leave used up. I think I've taken at least 1 or 2 weeks off in the last year, maybe more. I realise I'm lucky! Our department is well staffed and cover is built into contracts so it's easy to cover leave.

Dh is self employed so he takes an afternoon off. We have a nanny in the morning and DS is only at school in the afternoon. I would probably take an afternoon off if DH couldn't, but thankfully I haven't had to do that. I work in education so I have to take my leave at set times, I cannot get annual leave at any time other than school holidays.
I think getting checked out sounds like a good plan. I have four and at nursery age it is/was a few sick days a year average for all of them, seven ear infections! No wonder you are exhausted and need to vent!

Work from home or unpaid dependent leave. I never take annual leave to cover sickness. I love my holidays!

If he is a sickly child then nanny may work better than nursery.

Thanks for all the suggestions. He's thankfully never really ill with the infections, no fever, still happy, but nursery has a no attendance for 24h after starting antibiotics and that's what is causing us the childcare issues.

DH's job doesn't offer any parental leave. In theory I could work from home but since he's not actually poorly DS always wants to play so my productivity is very low! He is also fascinated with my laptop which doesn't make things any easier!

My mum lives far away and I see now how much help it must be having family nearby. She is always saying how she wishes she could help more. Maybe I should invent a jet pack

Honestly do yourselves a favour and switch to a childminder if you have a sickly child. They are much more tolerant of slightly poorly non infectious children. For instance in this case with the ear infection, it won't affect other children and it barely affects him, so he would definitely be able to attend. You may need to bob back to administer any antibiotics but that's it. Not only that but mine didn't even get sick because there are less children he is coming into contact with directly, so less illness to catch.

Badg3r whether his job offer the leave or not is irrelevant, it's a legal entitlement - see www.gov.uk/parental-leave/entitlement

Thanks for the link Cucumber. We thought about a childminder initially but in the end found the nursery that he now really loves. Is there such a thing as emergency childminders?!

The downside of a CM is if they are ill, there is no cover and you have to take a day off work to look after your DCs.